Julie and Danielle's Adventures
by LimitedByCreativity
Summary: What happened to them as the women went through Series 3? Noone took a lot of notice of Julie and Danielle, so I am. This is my take of what happens to Julie and Danielle through it all. First Fanfiction. COMPLETE! Big thanks to my sister!
1. Julie and Danielle's Sleepover

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_This is set shortly after the Season 2 finale. Thanks to my sister who helped write this. This is my first fan fic, and it's kinda fluffy…and silly! _

Julie and Danielle's Sleepover

Julie grabbed an extra quilt from the cupboard as Susan ran by.

"Hey, Mom," Julie grinned. Susan smiled back at her.

"Hi, honey. I'm going to go see Mike."  
Julie sighed. It had been three weeks since Mike Delfino, her mom's boyfriend, was knocked over by a car and put in a coma. Three weeks since her friend, Danielle, had seen her boyfriend get shot. Three weeks since Gabrielle Solis finally started divorce proceedings against her husband Carlos and three weeks since Lynette Scavo had met her husband's illegitimate love child, Kayla.

"I invited Danielle over to sleepover!" Julie called.  
"Yep! Okay!" Susan yelled on the way out. Julie rolled her eyes as she heard her mother say, "Oh, hi Danielle! Julie's upstairs!"   
Julie heard the door slam as Danielle Van de Kamp came upstairs, and waved at Julie.  
"Hey, Julie. Your mom off to see Mike?"  
Julie nodded, "Yeah. Come on in."  
They walked into Julie's room, where she was setting up a bed for Danielle, "So. What do you want to do?"  
Danielle smiled cheekily, "Well. Pillow fights are compulsory, secrets, talking about boys…oh and it's seven o'clock, my mom's on a date with Orson Hodge and we're going to go for a walk and spy on them!"  
Julie burst out laughing and tripped over the little camp bed set out for her best friend.

"Seriously?"  
Danielle nodded, "Yeah! She gets back from the restaurant at about eight, eight-thirty. Plenty of time to do stuff until we can go."  
Julie got up and folded her arms, "Why are you so interested in spying on your _mother_?"

"Because…" Danielle sighed and sat on Julie's bed, "Since Matthew held my mom at gunpoint, I've been trying to be nice to her. And really re-connect. And Mom's been hurt a _lot_ in the past. By Dad, an evil pharmacist, Andrew, and an evil alcohol slash sex addict."  
Julie raised an eyebrow, "_Huh_?"

"Anyway, I don't want to add evil dentist to that list."  
"_He's a dentist_?"

Danielle smirked and grinned at Julie, "Orson's perfectly nice. But I want to check up on her."  
Julie smiled sarcastically, "So, maybe you should of given her a curfew and hired a babysitter."  
Danielle's eyes lit up, "I should have!"  
Julie groaned, picked up a pillow and smacked Danielle around the head.

"Ow!" Danielle cried, and they started the first pillow fight of the night!

An hour and a half later, Julie lay asleep on the floor in her pink pyjamas while Danielle peered out of the window with binoculars, and her teddy-bear, John-Boy. She fingered her teddy's pink bow-tie and saw the silver Volvo come around the corner.

"Oh my God!" she cried, swallowing the last of her drink, which was very sugary,

"Julie, Julie, Julie, Julie, Julie, Julie," Danielle whispered, poking her friend, and then hitting her on the head with John-Boy.

Julie sat up, eyes wide and shaking hands from sugar-rush.

"W-w-w-w-w-what?"  
"M-m-m-m-m-Mom's home with O-o-o-o-o-Orson!" Danielle giggled.

Julie's eyes widened even more, "Let's stop talking like this and let's go, go, go, go, go!"  
They snuck over to the door when they heard Susan walking past the room. She knocked lightly on the door. Danielle and Julie clutched at each over, squashing the bear.

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Susan knocked on her daughter's door lightly. She heard shuffling and Danielle hissing about her jelly-babies.

"S-s-s-s-s-s-s-shut up about jelly babies!" she heard Julie hiss, with a giggle.

Susan opened the door and smelt the slight aroma of sugary drinks, candy, chocolate and…jelly babies!  
She glanced around the dark room, and saw the girls.

"Pat-a-cake, pat-a-cake, baker's man!"  
Susan stared at her daughter and Danielle Van de Kamp in horror.

"What?" Julie asked innocently.

Susan raised an eyebrow, "I thought we were past the Pat a Cake period! I gained a lot of weight when you were obsessed with cakes."  
Julie and Danielle both burst into fits of laughter. Susan grabbed a packet of jelly-babies and left the room, bidding the girls goodnight.

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The second the door closed, Danielle sat up, serious.

"She took my jelly-babies."  
"It's okay! We'll get some more."  
Danielle nodded and looked out the window.

"Hey! Wrong Volvo! The one I saw belonged to Mrs. Scavo. Apparently out at the bar again."  
Julie stared at her, "She drinks?"  
Danielle shrugged, "She has four kids, a husband who has revealed another child and a little whore for the kid's mother. I'd drink 'til I drop."

Julie laughed and came over to the window. Finally, they saw Bree's car in the distance.

"Quick!" Julie hissed. She got onto the window sill and leapt at the tree across her window. Danielle gaped as Julie grabbed onto a branch and pulled herself onto it.

"C'mon, D-D-D-D-Danielle!" Julie giggled.

Danielle hugged her bear tight, stood on the window sill and leapt…but fell past the tree and landed in a bush.

Julie bit her hand hard to stop her giggles and whispered, "You okay?"  
Danielle nodded up at her, rolling out of the bush covered in leaves, "Yeah. The sugar rush has numbed me."

Danielle grinned and brushed off her bear, while Julie frowned.  
"That's not a word!"  
"I don't care! Hee-hee!"  
Julie leapt down and landed in a perfect position, "You're right. This would generally kill my ankles!"  
The girls ran along the sidewalk until they were at the Delfino house. Bree's car rolled into the driveway as Danielle leant against the tree on Mike's lot.

"Woo!" she muttered, panting for breath. Julie peered over the fence at Bree and Orson, who were talking at her front-door.

Bree smiled at Orson, still fiddling with her keys.  
"I had a great evening. Thank you," Bree smiled.

Orson nodded, "No problem. I also had a good evening."

Danielle came up next to Julie, but gagged as Bree leant in to Orson and kissed him.  
"Yuk, yuk, yuk, YUK!" Danielle cried, a little _too_ loudly.

Orson and Bree broke apart and looked around.  
"Did you hear that?"  
Julie, who had one hand firmly clamped over Danielle's mouth, came up with only one solution: "Miaow!"  
Orson nodded, "A cat…I think…"

Bree rolled her eyes, "Ida Greenberg!"  
Danielle muttered through Julie's hand, "'he 'lames I'a for everyfing!"  
"What?" Julie asked, pulling her hand away.

Danielle smiled, "She blames Ida for everything."  
Julie giggled and peered over the gate again, where Bree and Orson were once again kissing.

"I'm not hyper anymore!" Julie sighed, "I'm feeling…scared that your mom will catch us!"  
Danielle smiled, "I have jelly babies!"

She reached into her pocket and pulled out the packet, but upon opening she gasped.

"Jelly baby…dust! I must have landed on them when I fell out the window. I killed them!"  
Julie patted her friend's shoulder, "It's okay, we'll eat the dust."  
Julie and Danielle ate the red dust, the green, the orange, but when they found the yucky yellow dust they threw it at Bree and Orson, who were too busy making out to notice.

"Go, Mrs. Van de Kamp!" Julie muttered. Danielle looked and gagged again.

Bree broke away from Orson and said, "Would you like to come in?"  
Orson was about to answer when he heard someone yell, "_No_!!!!!!!!!"  
He looked around, "Drunk? Ida?"

Bree grinned. Orson smiled back at her and said, "I'd love to come in, Bree."  
As the two disappeared inside, Danielle screamed into her bear's soft belly. After Danielle's hysteria passed, both girls climbed over the gate and went to peer in the living room window. Bree was at the bar, putting some wine into cups.

"I want one," Danielle snuffled, and Julie ground her elbow into Danielle's ribs.

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Bree and Orson sat on the couch, drinking their wine. Orson was talking about dentistry, but Bree wasn't listening. She was thinking about what might happen next. She could let it go on as it was. But this path would mean Orson going home the next morning. She could wait until they'd finished their drink, and then ask Orson to leave.

Hopefully he would be very gentlemanly about it and leave graciously. Bree could only think about nights she'd spent with other men, like Rex, with his fondness for S&M, and George, who had guilted her into it. She didn't know what Orson was going to be like. She didn't know if he was a good guy or a bad guy. It took her a minute until it occurred to her he was saying her name.

"…Bree? Bree?"

Bree plastered a smile on her face and turned to him, "Yes? Sorry about that."  
Bree's eyes traveled from Orson's concerned face to his empty wine glass.

"Would you like a refill?" Bree asked.

Orson shook his head, "No, I would like to know if everything is okay?"

Bree nodded, "Yes, I'm fine."  
She took another sip of her wine, and found herself finishing it in one. Orson raised his eyebrows, obviously amused. Bree smiled back at him. Orson sighed and put down his glass.

"I think I know what this is about, Bree."  
Bree put down her own glass as Orson kept talking, "You have been hurt a lot in the past. I know. I'm not going to force you into anything. I do like you. But I'm not going to make you do anything you don't want to do to keep me around. We can go by your time. I'm not going anywhere."  
Bree stared at him. Orson took her hand and smiled, "We okay?"

Bree leant forward and kissed Orson passionately, and soon they both lay flat out on the couch, still kissing, as Bree gave Orson a…_hint _she was ready for the next step. And both of them knew what was going to happen next.

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And so did Julie. Danielle had stopped peering a while ago and was busy mourning her jelly-babies. Danielle looked up at her friend and raised an eyebrow, "What?"  
Julie had a white face, "Erm…"

Danielle sat up and looked in the window, "They're gone! They must've gone upstairs! Let's…"  
Danielle stood up, and stretched her legs…and toppled into a ladder.

She squawked in delight, "Mom was cleaning out the rain gutters! This is brilliant!"  
Julie reached out to stop Danielle but it was too late. Her friend had dropped John-boy and was setting the ladder up right underneath her mother's window. Danielle scurried up the ladder and gestured for her friend to follow. Julie shrugged and unhappily did as she was told. Danielle finally got to the window and peered in.

"Dark…" she muttered. And then her eyes got accustomed to the darkness. She suddenly realized what was happening - thanks to the moaning and Barry White music playing - and, forgetting she and her friend were spying, forgetting no one was supposed to know they were out there, she shrieked loudly. Waking up almost the whole of Wisteria Lane.

Bree leapt out of the bed and grabbed her robe as she saw Danielle's stricken face at the window. She tiptoed over to the window, where Danielle's face was pale and her eyes were glazed over. She hadn't noticed Bree. Bree looked out the window and saw Julie Mayer, face bright red. Julie looked into Bree's face and waved timidly. Danielle finally snapped out of her trance and saw her mother. She yelled in surprise, letting go of the ladder and fell, grabbing a hold on Julie Mayer and dragging Julie down with her. Bree felt Orson appear beside her as they stared in shock out of the window, watching two teenage girls in a groaning heap on the grass.

"I _cannot_ believe you!" Susan cried, pacing around Bree's living room. She, Bree, and Orson stood in front of the two girls who sat on the couch, twigs and leaves in their hair and covered in dirt.

"I mean, _look at yourselves_!" Susan yelled. Julie and Danielle stole a glance at each other and burst into peals of laughter, though they stopped the second they saw Bree and Susan's looks of thunder.

"Well, in my defence, _it was Danielle's idea_!" Julie yelled. Danielle whacked Julie on the arm.

Bree knelt down in front of her daughter, who was frowning at her best friend.

"Danielle, why would you want to spy on me?"  
"Two reasons," Danielle mumbled miserably, "One, I was high on sugar. Two, I wanted to make sure Orson wasn't going to be a jackass like the others."  
Bree smiled softly, "That's so sweet."  
Danielle grinned, "And I'm punishing myself."  
"How?" Bree asked, while Orson wrapped an arm around her.

Danielle grimaced, "Well, I saw you two going at it, didn't I?"

_I hope you enjoyed it, though it's probably rubbish! Please R&R! Word of Warning: I may do another part. Depends on The BOREDOM FACTOR!_


	2. Julie and Danielle Meet the Doctor

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_I do not own Doctor Who. The BBC does! Ha! Now you BBC people can't sue me! I know you wanted to! This is set shortly after the Season 2 finale. Thanks to my sister who helped write this. This is really silly, and a Desperate Housewives crossover with Doctor Who! This is based around the DW episode,_ Blink._ I can hear the disbelief in your gasps that someone might actually cross these 2 opposite shows. This is Part 2. _

Julie and Danielle Meet the Doctor

It was a sunny day on Wisteria Lane, and Julie Mayer and Danielle Van de Kamp sat on deck chairs in Danielle's back yard, drinking soda and working on their tans.

"So, has your mom forgiven you for spying on her and her boyfriend?" Julie smirked.

"No television for a week. Plus, I've got the mental image in my mind of what Orson and she were _doing_ in bed. God, it's worse then hearing Mom and Dad do it."  
Julie shuddered, "Okay, gross!"  
Danielle laughed and got up, "I'm going to get some jelly-babies!"  
"Danielle!"  
"_I can't help it, I love them_!" Danielle cried.

Danielle was walking back to the house when she noticed a small box on the floor.

"Hey. A DVD," Danielle grinned. Julie peered at it.  
"Very interesting."  
Danielle glanced up and found herself face to face with a horrible statue her mother bought at a garage sale.

"Yuk," she muttered.

"Want to watch this?" she asked, shoving the Angel Statue back up against the wall of the house.

"Sure," Julie answered. Then. They Both Blinked.

The statue was in front of Danielle again.

"Monkey!" she yelled, jumping into the arms of Julie, who promptly dropped her.

"What the hell?" Julie cried.

"Sorry. Anyway, want to watch this?"  
"You're not allowed to watch the television."  
"Who _cares_?"  
"Okay."   
Danielle glared at the statue of a _weeping angel_ and followed Julie into the house.

Danielle put the DVD in the player and pressed play. She sat down next to Julie and they squashed a big bowl of jelly babies in between them.

"Yellow one!" yelled Julie, and she threw it at the screen. At that moment, a tall skinny brown haired man walked onto screen and sat on a stool, staring at the girls.

"Wow, _hot_!"  
"Danielle! They're jelly-babies!"  
"No! Him!"  
"Thank you," the man on screen said.

"_What_?" Julie cried, "Oh my God, did he just talk to us?"  
"Oh, damn. Americans," the man muttered. Danielle glared at him and subconsciously threw a _green _jelly baby at him.

"_No!_"   
"Oi!" the man said, "Listen!"  
"Wait!" Julie cried, "Sir, are you….?"  
"What?"  
"Are you the Doctor?"  
The man jumped and his brown eyes widened nervously, "_What_?"  
"See, you look like the Doctor! Did you park the TARDIS on a meter? Do you like Billie Piper?"  
"Oi! So what if I do?"  
Danielle and Julie burst out laughing. The man groaned.

"Listen! I'm the Doctor."  
Danielle and Julie froze, "_Seriously?_"

The Doctor grinned, "I am. And, do you own some weeping angels statue?"  
Danielle frowned, "Unfortunately. It keeps making me jump by leaping out in front of me!"  
The Doctor smiled, "Sorry,"

Julie turned around and shrieked. Danielle turned and saw the statue.

"Julie…"  
The Doctor knocked on the screen, "_Hello? _Listen, just keep an eye on it!"  
"Okay," Julie nodded. Danielle stared at the man.  
"What is he after? Better not be my jelly-babies!"  
The Doctor's eyes lit up, "_Jelly-babies_?"  
Danielle cried out loud, "_Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!_"

The Doctor shook his head, "No. Anyway, that Angel…it can move when you blink, look away, whatever. So, don't turn around…don't look away…and whatever you do…don't _blink_!"  
Danielle took a jelly-baby and ate it. And suddenly…_sugar rush_!  
"Oh, no! Sugar r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-rush! C-c-c-c-c-c-c-can't stop b-b-b-b-b-b-blinking!"  
Danielle's eyes didn't stop fluttering. The Doctor hurridly tried to talk to her.

"No…no, Danielle! No-no! N - n - _stop_! _Don't make me come out there_!"

Danielle stopped blinking, "Mamma mia!"

The Doctor sighed in relief. Danielle fell exasperated into Julie's lap.  
Julie looked down at her friend. Danielle felt a cold marble arm slip towards the bowl.

"No!" Danielle yelled, and she lunged at the angel which froze. As Danielle grabbed the bowl, the Angel threw caution to the wind and un-froze, and he and Danielle were caught in a tug-of-war with the bowl as a rope.  
Julie sighed, "Oh no,"  
The Doctor suddenly stepped out the television.  
"Wow, you're tall."  
"Wow, you're short,"  
Julie frowned as a black haired woman followed the Doctor.

"Hi, I'm Martha."  
"Nice to meet you, I'm Julie." Julie pointed at Danielle, "That's my friend, Danielle."  
Martha smiled, "Oooh, jelly-babies."  
Danielle and the Angel turned towards Martha, fury etched on their faces.

"_Mine_!" Danielle yelled, "Mine mine mine mine mine mine mine _mine_!"   
Martha raised an eyebrow, "I like yellow ones."  
Danielle pulled a face, and she and the Angel started throwing yellow ones at her.  
"I shall take these like a man." Martha decided, and started catching them in her mouth. The Doctor glared at her.

"You shall never defeat me, angel!" The Doctor said, pulling out his sonic screwdriver. The Angel roared as the Doctor pressed a button on the small device and the Angel exploded into a cloud of dust.

Danielle shrieked, "_My friend!_"  
She glared at the Doctor and threw a handful of yellow jelly-babies at him. He shrieked like a girl, whilst Martha lunged onto the floor and started eating them.

Julie put her arm around Danielle and consoled her.

"Sorry," the Doctor muttered, "But it was just an alien."  
"It was Angel. My friend. President of the Jelly-Baby club!" Danielle whispered. The Doctor burst out laughing and hauled Martha up.

"Bye bye," he grinned and he left. Danielle wailed loudly. As he left, Julie saw him check his watch and heard him say the last words she'd ever hear from him:  
"Damn it! I parked the TARDIS on a metre!"

_Hope you enjoyed that! Please R&R!! _


	3. Julie and Danielle Spill the Beans

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed…okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back…please?_

_Thanks to my sister who helped write this. This is the 3__rd__ part at it is _quite _silly. Anyways, this is set during the first episode of series 3 when Bree and Orson just got engaged and _no-one_ but Danielle know. _

Julie and Danielle Spill the Beans

Danielle was spooning ice cream into a bowl and smothering it in chocolate sauce and whipped cream when her mother and Orson Hodge came in.

"Mom," Danielle grinned.

"Danielle, we have to tell you something!" Bree said, glancing at Orson.

"Oh my God, you're pregnant!"  
Bree rolled her eyes, "No! Why do you think that?"  
"Well, the shirt…"  
Bree moaned and buried her head into Orson's shoulder.

"Danielle," Orson smiled, "Your mother and I have been dating for six months and, well, we've decided to get married!"  
Danielle dropped her ice cream. The bowl shattered and the ice cream covered her feet and legs.  
"_Ewwwwww_!" Danielle yelled. Bree swooped in with cloths and hot water but Danielle swatted her away.

"You're getting married?"  
Bree nodded and showed her the diamond ring.

"Oh my God!" Danielle grinned, "I can see where the _Titanic_ hit it."

Bree laughed and hugged Danielle, "Oh! I'm so happy you're happy about this. But keep it a secret until the engagement party."

Danielle froze. Secret? Oh boy, she wasn't very good at this!

"Orson and I are going to the country club for lunch so I'll see you later, okay?" Bree grinned, taking Orson's hand and leading him away. Danielle looked at the phone and folded her arms.

"No!" she muttered and suddenly she thought she could hear the phone talking back.

"_Aw! C'mon, Danielle, you know you want to! Julie Mayer is speed dial one. Just push the button! Push it, c'mon Danielle! Every second you stop yourself, a phone battery dies."  
_Danielle gasped and grabbed the phone, dialling Julie's number.

"Hello, Julie?" she said, when the phone was answered, "It's Danielle…I have some great gossip! Meet me at the lamp post in five minutes…okay, bye!"  
Danielle hung up and as she got ready to leave, she could've sworn she heard a little voice.

"_Good girl, Danielle. All the phone batteries are safe! Yay!"  
_Danielle smiled happily and left the house.

Danielle leant against the lamp post. Mrs. Solis jogged by.

"Hi, Danielle," she grinned.

"Hi, Mrs. Solis. Have you seen Julie?"  
"Nope, sorry. Bye!"  
Mrs. Solis jogged on. A second later, Lynette Scavo and Susan Mayer walked by.

"Mrs. Mayer," Danielle said, "Have you seen Julie?"  
"Yeah. She's just coming," Susan answered.

"Thanks," Danielle smiled, as Julie came out of her house.

"Julie!" she cried, running to meet her.

"Hey, Danielle. So, what's up?"

Danielle grinned, "Guess _what_? Mom and Orson are getting married!"  
Julie gasped, "Oh my God! Wow! It seems like just yesterday we were spying on them on their first date."  
Danielle nodded, "I have to keep it a secret!"  
Julie frowned, "You're not doing the best job then."  
Danielle shrugged, "Well, if I didn't spill, then a phone battery would die!"  
Julie raised her eyebrows but decided not to comment, as their friend Polly Bennet came up.  
"Hey, Julie. Hey, Danielle," Polly grinned, "What's up?"  
"Nothing," Julie said.

"Yeah, except my mom's getting married to Orson Hodge!" Danielle smiled, and then she clamped her hand over her mouth, "Aw, crap!"  
Polly gasped, "Oh my God! How _great_! Oh, I've got to go!"  
Polly ran off, not hearing Danielle's cries of, "No! Polly! Secret! Don't tell _anyone_!"  
Danielle moaned and rested her head on Julie's shoulder, "Mom is going to kill me! Polly has the biggest mouth in the whole of Fairview."  
Julie put her arm around Danielle, "Nice knowing you!"  
Danielle frowned, "My jelly-babies would be sad!"  
Julie groaned, "Danielle, for the last time, _they won't care_! Your mom would eat them before they'd realize something is wrong!"  
"Don't say that!" Danielle snapped, "They care!"

Bree was furious. She and Orson were having a nice lunch at the Country Club when Tammy Bennet walked in and waved at her.

"Bree!" she smiled, walking up to the table, "Polly told me about the _big day_, congratulations."  
As Tammy walked away, Bree's _Perfect Housewife_ smile fell from her face and she stared at Orson.

"How did she know?" Orson asked. Bree frowned.  
"Polly is Danielle's friend."  
Orson's eyes widened in realization. Bree looked over and saw Tammy chatting with a group of women, and they all glanced at her and smiled.

"Now everyone knows!" Bree cried. Orson took her hand, "It's okay. They were going to find out anyway."  
"But I wanted them to know when _we _told them." Bree sighed.

Orson nodded, "I know, but still. At least they know."

Bree smiled, "I need a chat with my daughter now."

Danielle sat at home with Julie, chewing her hair when the phone rang. She answered it and heard her friend Sheila's voice.

"Sheila. Hi," Danielle said, "What? You have twenty packets of _jelly babies?_ I'm there! What else is up? Me neither. Except my mother's getting married…damn it all to hell!"  
Danielle hung up the phone and threw it at the door. At the same time, Orson opened it and was hit in the head.

Danielle gasped, "Oh…holy monkey…"  
Bree looked at Orson's head and glared at Danielle.

"You are in _ a lot_ of trouble, Danielle."  
"Just a phone, Mom!"  
"I mean, that and telling people about our engagement."  
Julie spoke up timidly, "Congratulations?"  
Bree glared at her, so Julie stood up and started to leave, "I should go! Feel better, Mr. Hodge,"  
Danielle tried to follow her friend out of the door but Bree held onto her arm until the door was closed.

"Why did you tell Polly Bennet, Danielle?"  
"It just slipped out. As well with Sheila! I wanted to save the phone batteries!"  
"_What?_" Bree cried, "Okay, first you spy on me and Orson, then you claim you've met the Doctor and destroy my angel statue…-"  
"I'm _telling you_, that Angel was alive! It tried to steal my jelly babies! And I met the Doctor!!!"  
"Doctor Who?" Orson muttered. Danielle cheered and laughed, "That's right!"  
"What a load of poppycock!" Bree snapped. Danielle burst out laughing, "Didn't want to say _a load of crap_, huh, Mom?"  
Bree glared at her, "Go to your room,"  
Danielle shrugged and walked upstairs, "No funny stuff, Mom! I'm trusting you alone with Orson!"  
Bree glared at Danielle and turned to Orson.  
"I've got to go back to the country club and meet Lynette, Gabby and Susan. And I'm sorry about your head,"  
Orson shrugged, "I'm okay beautiful,"  
Bree smiled and leaned in to kiss Orson.  
"None of that, you kids!" Danielle's voice carried downstairs. Bree sighed and left the house, blowing a kiss at Orson.

_Hope you enjoyed. Please review…or a phone battery will die somewhere_ 


	4. Julie and Danielle At Bree's Wedding

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please?_

_Thanks to my sister who helped write this. This is the 4__th__ part at it is _quite _silly. Anyways, this is set during Bree and Orson's wedding but chaos will probably ensure! And you can blame Julie and Danielle, of course!_

Julie and Danielle At Bree's Wedding

Danielle climbed down the stairs, yawning thanks to the early hour, but burst out laughing when she looked at the sight in her living room.

"What the heck?" she spluttered. Lynette Scavo, Gabrielle Solis and Susan Mayer glared at her, sporting lime-green dresses with pink sashes.

"Aren't they darling!" Bree sighed, "They'll go _great _with my colouring!"  
"For someone with your colouring," Lynette muttered, and Gabrielle elbowed her.

"It doesn't matter if you don't like them," Danielle grinned, sneaking her phone out and taking pictures, "No one will _ever know_!"  
The three women glared at Danielle as Bree started upstairs and Susan started talking about Orson.

Danielle was happy to ignore what her mother's friends were discussing, while she sent the pictures to all the people on her phone's call list. Then, she noticed something on the floor - an old green jelly-baby from her adventure with Julie and the Doctor! Danielle gasped, "A jelly-baby! And it's _still alive_!"

Happy, she picked up the jelly-baby, blew on it slightly and popped it into her mouth, grinning giddily, and deciding to listen to what Susan was saying.

"Well, I'm sorry, I cannot sit here on my key lime ass and watch Bree make the worst mistake of her life!" Susan snapped. Someone cleared her throat on the stairs. Danielle turned, still chewing.

"What mistake would that be?" Bree asked.

"Befriending a crazy, jelly-baby-stealer," muttered Danielle. She hadn't forgotten the sleepover with Julie Mayer when Susan had taken a packet of Danielle's jelly-babies. Susan paused for a moment before replying, "Well. Um. Honestly…these dresses are hideous."

There was a silence, one which Danielle broke.

"I'm gonna call Julie, tell her that she's a mother-less mongrel,"

The women stared at her.

Danielle raised her eyebrows, "What? You're _not_ gonna kill Susan? All right!"

She flipped her phone shut, and muttered, "I'm gonna get more jelly-babies,"

Bree frowned at her, "Danielle, I thought we talked about this…"

"_Look_! I'm _not_ going to a jelly-baby rehab and that's _that!_" Danielle yelled.

She looked around, blushed, and left, muttering something about how jelly-babies were nice when you got to know them.

Susan smiled, "Jelly-baby rehab?"  
"Hey!" Bree snapped, "You were the one who stole from her!"  
"Oh no!" Lynette cried, "That's not good! Once, Danielle was eating on the front lawn and she had some jelly-babies…"  
"She wouldn't let you have some?" Gabrielle asked.

"Not me! Penny!" Lynette cried.

"She had it _coming_!" Danielle yelled.

The big day finally dawned on Wisteria Lane. Susan, Lynette, Bree, Gabrielle, Danielle and Julie were in the back room of the church. Danielle brushed imaginary specks off her purple dress and grinned at her mother.

"Okay! I'm clean and I look maid-of-honour material!"  
Bree smiled and handed her a packet of jelly-babies.

"Finally!" Danielle sighed, opening it.

Susan managed to get Bree's attention so Danielle turned to Julie.  
"Weddings," Julie sighed, "So romantic."  
Danielle fished a yellow jelly baby out of her packet and threw it at Julie.

"Oi!"  
"What is so great about _weddings_?" Danielle snapped, "I'm never going to get married. Too much hassle."  
"What if you get pregnant?"  
"I don't care. We'll be girlfriend and boyfriend who live together, have a kid, but don't want any real commitment! Like Perry and Jordan out of _Scrubs_!"  
"That show's awesome,"  
"He did not hack her up and dissolve the pieces in acid!" Bree cried, getting the teenagers' attention.

"Hello?" Danielle whispered, moving towards the argument.  
"I said it was a theory." Gabrielle muttered.  
"The point is Alma disappeared under very suspicious circumstances." Lynette told her.  
"I don't have time for this. I'm getting married now."  
"This is your day. You can push the ceremony back an hour. Now get that detective on the phone and talk things out with Orson." Susan cried.

"Oh, Mom!" Julie moaned loudly. Susan shot her a look.

"Honey, go find a pew."  
Julie waved at Danielle and left to tell the vicar they could be a while.  
"I can't talk to Orson. It's bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding!" "You know what's really bad luck? Marrying a wife killer." Lynette smiled sarcastically, folding her arms.  
"If the three of you don't drop this right now, I will never forgive you." Bree hissed, harshly.  
Susan raised her hands in defeat, "Bree, we are just doing this because we love you. But, if you can honestly tell us that you don't have the slightest doubt…"  
"None whatsoever." Bree snapped.

Danielle stood there quietly, as Gabby, Lynette and Susan picked up their bouquets and left the room. Bree turned to Danielle.

"Good luck, Mom," Danielle whispered, hugging Bree.

"Thanks, sweetheart." Bree smiled, "You don't think he killed Alma, right?"  
"I'll agree for another packet of jelly babies!"  
"Danielle!"  
"At least tell me where you hid them!" Danielle moaned. Bree sighed and handed her another packet.

"Orson rocks!" Danielle cried, grabbing her flowers and following the other ladies.

At the reception later, Julie eyed the ice sculpture, and a prank formed in her overactive imagination. It reminded her _slightly_ of a jelly-baby…

Bree and Orson were partaking in their first dance as a married couple. Julie gestured at Danielle to get up and come over. She did so very discreetly, as not to get the attention of the tearful audience, watching the couple's first dance. Danielle caught snippets of Bree and Orson's conversation, but ignored them as she made her way over to Julie.

"Danielle!" Julie whispered, "See that ice sculpture?"

Danielle looked at it and hissed very quietly, "Jelly baby…"

Julie felt a bit guilty. She felt it was her fault Danielle was so obsessed with jelly-babies, as when they were little, Julie told Danielle if she kept eating jelly babies until she was twenty, she'd have super powers. Apparently, Danielle still believed that. "Yes, that ice sculpture is a _real _jelly baby," Julie hissed, "Mint. One of a kind."

Danielle made her way over to it and put her finger on it, but quickly snatched it back, "Cold!"

Julie nodded, "It's supposed to be!"

Danielle grinned, stuck out her tongue, and leaned into the ice sculpture…

Bree and Orson finished their dance, and Bree was relieved to have finished the conversation she'd had with her husband. As the applause died down, there was a almighty screech. Everyone turned around to see Julie Mayer cackling like a witch and Danielle Van de Kamp with her tongue stuck to the giant ice sculpture. Bree resisted the urge to laugh, and walked briskly to her daughter's side.

"Danielle, why is your tongue stuck to my sculpture?" Bree asked quietly.

Danielle made an inaudible sound, which Julie translated as "Don't ask."

Bree sighed and hissed, "We'll have to wait until the sculpture melts, dear,"

Danielle moaned, and pushed Porter or Preston Scavo off his chair to steal it.

The twin grumbled, rubbing his backside, and walked away. The other one followed, laughing until his brother pushed him and they began fighting. Bree and Lynette moved in to stop the madness.

Danielle then tried again to tug her tongue off the ice, but in vain. She crossed her arms and glared at Julie, before making a strange noise that sounded _slightly _like, "I hope you're happy!"

"Ecstatic!" Julie grinned, and walked away. Danielle rolled her eyes and reached into her pocket for the packet of jelly-babies Bree had given her. She grabbed a red one and put it in her mouth, but when she tried to chew, she bit her tongue.

"Oww!" she squealed, then Danielle Van de Kamp cried. Not because she was stuck on an ice sculpture, or that her tongue was throbbing and she tasted blood, but because she could not eat jelly-babies.

Julie walked back, and saw Danielle crying. Danielle made some weird sounds, to which Julie answered, "What can't you do?" and then she took a moment to wonder why she could understand Danielle when no-one else could. Danielle held up the bag of jelly-babies and waved them. Julie nodded in understanding and hugged Danielle.

Danielle realised she still had that lovely, red jelly-baby in her mouth and took a gamble.

Julie gasped as Danielle made coughing sounds, and turned purple. Danielle stood and made a desperate attempt to rip her tongue off the sculpture. She tripped over the chair, her tongue left the ice and as she landed painfully, the jelly-baby flew out of her mouth and soared past Julie. Danielle coughed and sat up as Bree ran to her side.

"Danielle! Are you okay?"

Danielle could make only one sound, thanks to the pain in her tongue, throat and backside:

"_Ooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwww!_"

_Hope you enjoyed. Please R&R__…__or I'll stick my sister's tongue to an ice sculpture, take a picture and post it on the internet! _


	5. Julie and Danielle When Andrew Returns

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please?_

_Thanks to my sister who helped write this. This is the 5__th__ part and is a bit sadder. Anyways, this is set in ep. 3, season 3!_

Julie and Danielle When Andrew Returns

"No _way_!" Julie cried. Danielle nodded sadly.  
"Andrew didn't run away?" Julie whispered, "Your mom abandoned him? What a stone cold bi…"  
"Hey!" Danielle yelled, "Andrew did it with her boyfriend!"  
Julie pulled a face, "Okay. Maybe he's the horrible excuse for a human being…"  
Danielle nodded, "Anyways, every since Mom saw him on the news, she's been hunting him down. She only found him once, and he told her to take a hike,"  
Julie took another handful of popcorn and lay back on Danielle's bed, "Talk about a juicy secret. It's been _ages_ since I slept over at your house. Not long since you stayed at mine."  
Danielle giggled at the memory, "Hell, that was a good sleepover. I still have a bruise from falling off that ladder."  
There was a knock on the door and Bree entered.  
"Holy cow!" Danielle cried, staring at her mother's exquisite blue dress, "Mom, how hot are you?"  
Bree grinned, and continued putting her earrings in, "Okay, the number for the restaurant is on the fridge, and if you need help _immediately_, just call 911,"  
Danielle nodded, "Okay. Have fun with Orson."  
Bree waved and left. Julie sighed sadly, "Poor thing. She may look like a princess, but all the make-up in the world couldn't cover the blue bags under her eyes."  
Danielle agreed, "She's been up quite late. Crying and stuff."  
Julie felt tears spring to her eyes, "Why am I crying?"  
She glanced over at the window and saw a bowl of onions sitting on it.

"_Hey_!"

Danielle burst out laughing, as Julie tossed the onions out of the window.

"_Girls_!" yelled Bree. Julie looked out of the window, and saw Bree barely containing her laughter as Orson wiped onion off of him.

"Sorry, Mr. Hodge…" Julie called, smiling sheepishly.

Orson waved at her and walked towards the car, trying to muster his confidence as Bree kept giggling.

"Oh, _God_!" Julie hissed, "I'm _so _embarrassed!"

Danielle sighed, tears streaming from her eyes from her laughter. She sniffled, "I would be too."  
"Yeah, but you've over-embarrassed yourself lately." Julie huffed. Danielle shrugged in agreement.

"Anyways, you know Edie Britt's nephew, Austin? Is he _hot_ or what?"  
Julie shrugged, "_Comme ci, comme ça!_"

Danielle gasped, "You think he's a chicken?"  
"No! He's…_alright_! And '_comme ci, comme ça' _means 'not too good, not too bad'."  
"Oooooooooh."  
Julie rolled her eyes and looked at the family picture Danielle had on her nightstand.

"I feel really bad for your mom and Andrew…"  
Suddenly, Julie had an idea. An idea that could get them in trouble. An idea that was so dangerous, Danielle usually had them. An idea so daring…they'd need plenty of sugar.

"Danielle." Julie snapped, "I have an idea. But, we need your jelly-babies. And candy, chocolate, and fizzy drinks."

Julie shook her head, "But your mom hid all of the jelly-babies."  
Danielle grinned widely, "Don't count on it!"  
Danielle went to her wardrobe and opened it. Under the hanging clothes were hundreds upon hundreds of packets of jelly-babies.

_Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!_

Julie hugged Danielle, "Your obsession is paying off!"  
"Anyways, what's with the sugar rush, Jules?"  
"We are going to sneak off into the bad part of town and find Andrew Van de Kamp! Yeah!"  
"Who's dat?"  
"…Your brother."  
"_Oh._"

Less than an hour later, the girls had devoured all but one of the jelly-baby packets, drank all of the sodas and munched all the chocolate bars.

Julie, shaking from sugar rush, opened the fridge and grabbed a sugary doughnut. Danielle poured a big bowl of sugary cereal and put the contents of the sugar bowl on it before drowning it in maple syrup.  
"T-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-this is your b-b-b-b-b-b-best idea _ever_!" Danielle swooned, "W-w-w-w-w-why do we need to be hyper?"  
"So that we have balls." Julie muttered.

Danielle nodded, stretching her mouth into a sugary grin, "My only regret? We went cannibal on the jelly-babies."

Julie nodded in agreement, "We are r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-ready!"  
Danielle and Julie opened the door and stepped into the crisp night air. Danielle wiped sugar from her mouth and wrapped her thin jacket around her. They opened the garage door and saw Bree's car.

"No!" Julie cried, "I refuse! We are driving _nowhere_ in this c-c-c-c-c-condition!"

**Twenty Minutes Later**

Danielle whooped as she drove Julie down the highway towards town. Julie clung to the dashboard, silently praying for her life. When she opened her eyes, Danielle had parked at the side of the road, in the worst part of Fairview. Breeding ground for homeless teenagers like Andrew. Julie pulled her jacket hood over her head and climbed out of the door. Danielle did likewise and locked the car, before sidling onto the sidewalk and grabbing Julie's arms.

"I f-f-f-f-f-f-f-feel like a spy!" grinned Danielle, giggling. Julie rolled her eyes and they set off on the look for Danielle's brother.

It was not long before they found a clue, in the form of someone named Victoria.

"Hello!" she snapped, when they accidentally bumped into her.

"Oooh! Julie! It's Victor/Victoria!" Danielle laughed, before Julie slapped her hand over her mouth.

"Hi. I'm looking for t-t-t-this boy!" Julie stuttered, holding out the picture of Andrew and his family.

"Oh, honey. You high?" the woman asked. Julie shrugged and nodded.

"This guy owes me money."  
"You sell…_stuff_?"  
"Erm…s-s-s-s-s-sure? But we only sell to people we've met."  
The prostitute held out her/his hand, "I'm Victoria! Gimme!"  
"I _knew it_!" Danielle laughed.

"Sorry, none on us!" Julie muttered, elbowing Danielle, "But have you seen this boy?"  
Victoria nodded, "He went into the soup kitchen about five minutes ago."  
Victoria pointed at a small building across the road. Danielle and Julie could see it was crowded and they could smell the stench it gave off from over here.

"Thanks," Julie muttered, before grabbing Danielle and speeding across the road, dodging traffic. Julie and Danielle burst into the soup kitchen, and gasped. It was crowded with many people, female, male, children and the like. Danielle grabbed Julie's hand and hissed, "Look, Andrew rejected Mom. We should just go home!"  
Julie stared at her, "But…you're his sister. He must understand you more. Was that sugar rush I gave you all for nothing?"  
Danielle pleaded with Julie, "_Yes_! I'm freaked out! This place is full of people who need money! We look like pretty little rich girls. They might mug us…or do something _worse_!"  
Julie followed Danielle's line of vision and realised she was staring at a tall man with lanky, long black hair and a five o' clock shadow, who was staring at them almost _hungrily_.

"He looks like he needs some jelly-babies…"  
"_Danielle_!" Julie snapped.

Danielle sighed, "Let's just go!"  
But as Danielle tried to drag Julie out, Julie found someone else grabbing her other arm.

"Goin' so soon?" Lanky Hair Man asked.

Julie tried to wrench her hand away, "What the hell? Let me go!"  
Danielle stared at him, "_Hey_! Let her go, you freak!"  
Lanky Hair Man moved closer, so Julie could feel his dog-breath on her face, "Little girl like you seems to be in the wrong part of town. Why don't you stick around? Come for a walk with me?"  
Julie screeched, "Let go of me!"  
"_Hey!_" a voice yelled, "Let her go, Pete!"  
Julie and Danielle looked over to see a hooded man, marching up to the lanky-haired man, who apparently was called _'Pete'_.

"What business is it of yours?" Pete demanded, holding onto Julie's arm even tighter.

"Well, this girl is screaming at you to leave her alone, so respect a lady's wishes!" the mystery man drawled.

Pete shoved the man with his free arm. The other man did not react kindly, and wound his fist back, before throwing it forward and punching the guy in the jaw. Pete fell to the floor, clutching his face in agony, while the Mystery Man pushed Danielle and Julie out of the door. Danielle heard the spectators run to help Pete.

"What the _hell_ are you two doing here?" the man demanded.

Julie and Danielle moved away, "What business is it of yours? So, we're grateful you saved us, but still. We're big girls!"  
"It's all my business!" The man snapped, and he threw his hood back to reveal the slightly older, less-shaven Andrew Van de Kamp.

"Oh!" Danielle cried, dropping Julie's hand. She didn't care her brother was dirty and smelly, or that his clothes were wrinkled, or that he was her _brother_, she still stepped towards him and threw her arms around his neck, "Andrew, Andrew, Andrew, Andrew, Andrew, Andrew, _Andrew!_"

Andrew hugged her back, "Hey, Danielle."  
Danielle felt tears escape her eyes as she released him. Julie stepped forward and hugged him too, "Andrew!"  
Andrew smiled at the girls, "What's up, girls? Why did you go and turn Pete on?"  
Danielle shuddered, "Bergh!"

"We were looking for you," Julie told him, "We had loads of sugar to keep us calm, but our nerves failed us."

Danielle butted in, "As did our sugar!"  
"Why were you looking for me?"  
Julie sighed, "We want you to come home. Ever since you left, Bree has been miserable."  
"What about her new husband?" Andrew snarled, kicking a dustbin, "Orson what-cha-ma-gig?"

"She loves him, sure. But ever since you refused to come home, she's been up all-night. Crying. Orson hasn't woken up thanks to those loud _sobs_ but I have!" Danielle muttered, grudgingly.

"Orson doesn't comfort her?"

"Nah. He's a deep sleeper. You could probably slap him silly and he's sleep for twelve hours." Danielle joked.

Andrew sighed, "I can't go back. She _abandoned _me."  
"You _did_ her boyfriend!" Julie countered. Andrew blushed.

"Look! Think about coming home. Think about making up with Mom. Think about making her happy after you've made her so sad. You owe her that much," Danielle sighed, and she led Julie back towards the car. Julie glanced at her watch and her eyes popped, "Eleven o' clock? Ooh! Let's hope your mom isn't home!"

Julie's wishes were in vain. The second the two tumbled in the front door, they saw Bree, Orson and even Susan standing over them.

"Oh, crap." Julie muttered, standing up.  
"You two like sneaking out at sleepovers, don't you?" Bree smiled, nonchalantly.

Danielle shrugged, "It's okay,"

Susan stood, hands on hips, "What was it this time? Why are you two in hooded tops? Julie, why is the sleeve so grimy?"  
Julie glanced at her left arm and saw dirt where Pete had obviously put his hand on her.

"Damn it, Pete!"  
"Pete?" Susan cried, "Who is Pete? What were you two doing?"  
Danielle looked at Julie. Julie looked at Danielle.

"We can't say," they chorused. The adults looked taken aback.

"You stole my _car_!" Bree snapped, "You might as well tell me what you did with it?"  
Danielle sighed, "We can't tell. It's not our choice. But, know this much, we did it for _you_, Mom!"  
Bree rolled her eyes, "Oh brother!"  
"True story!" Julie cried, "In fact, maybe we shouldn't have gone to see him. They don't appreciate it!"  
"Who's him?" Orson asked quietly. Julie and Danielle shrugged.

"Don't know…" Julie grinned. Danielle caught her mom's eye. Bree was smiling, and when she saw Danielle, she mouthed _"Andrew?"_ and Danielle winked.

**The Next Day**

Andrew hesitated a moment. Could he go back in there? He wanted to see her, and Danielle, and even meet this Orson guy. But, he and his mother had a bad relationship. He'd nearly got hit by ten cars just to escape her. But Andrew Van de Kamp wasn't a baby. He wouldn't let his nerves fail him. He knocked on the door and found himself praying she wasn't home. But Bree opened the door, and stared at him, eyes wide, mouth agape. Andrew smiled quietly.

"I didn't think the girls would've actually convince you." she whispered. Andrew met her eyes, suddenly feeling very aware he was dirty. But it almost seemed like she'd forgotten she was opposed to dirt, as she opened her arms and pulled her son into a tight hug. He felt tears prickle the back of his eyelids as he hesitantly put his arms around her too. He opened one eye and sure Danielle on the staircase, brushing her hair, and smiling, before reaching into her pocket and pulling out a packet of jelly-babies.

Andrew refrained himself from laughing, "Still obsessed with jelly-babies, huh?"

_Hope you enjoyed. Please review!__…__please be as nice as possible, I know this chapter is a lot different from the others. Less J.B.A (Jelly Baby Action)_


	6. Julie and Danielle and The Teacher

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please?_

_Okay, 3 reviews from 2 people. LAAAAME! I would even settle for CRITISM here! _

Julie and Danielle and The Teacher

Bree watched approvingly as Danielle finished her history project. Although she didn't approve of the method (a model made entirely out of jelly-babies!), she was happy Danielle was _doing _history homework rather than getting some unfortunate nerd or Julie to do it.

"I'm so happy, Danielle. I can't believe this teacher got you so into history!" Bree laughed. Then she made the Biggest Mistake of The Day. She took one jelly-baby from Danielle's hand…and Ate It.

"_Mom_!" Danielle whined, "You…you…ate _Stan_!"

"Erm…sorry. Anyway, Mr. Faladi has done _great_!" Bree smiled.

Danielle smiled smugly, "Indeed, he has, Mom,"  
Bree raised an eyebrow but just then the phone rang.

"Hello?"  
"Hi, Mrs. Van de -- I mean, Hodge," Bree heard Julie's voice through the phone, "Is Danielle there?"  
"Yes, she's just here," Bree said, handing the phone to Danielle.

"Hi, Julie. What's up?"  
"I called your mother Van de Kamp again!" Julie moaned. Danielle smiled.

"You'll get used to it."  
"Anyway, do you want to go out shopping?"  
"Sure, why not? I'll see you at the mall in an hour."

**One Hour Later**

Julie sat on the stone rim of the fountain, sipping a soda as she waited for Danielle. A few minutes later, Danielle appeared, and waved at her.

"Hey, Julie," she grinned, sitting next to her.

"So, is your mom happy we got Andrew back?"  
"Hell, yeah. She lifted my grounding; she was in such a good mood. And when she found out how Mr. Faladi got me back into history, she even told me I could have a sleepover again once two months have gone by."  
"Wow. Your mom is much nicer than mine…" Julie pulled a face, "Boy, that sounded weird. Anyways, I had to beg her to just let me out _once_."

Danielle smiled.

"So, Danielle. How did Mr. Faladi get you so into History again?"  
Julie saw Danielle blush and duck her head, "Boy…well…I-I don't know?"  
Julie frowned, "You're keeping something from me. C'mon, tell me what!"  
Danielle sighed, "Fine."  
She leant in close to Julie and hissed, "I'm sleeping with him,"  
Julie spluttered, fell backwards and landed with a splash in the fountain.

"You're _sleeping with him_?!!" Julie cried, when she and Danielle were in the bathroom and she was drying off.

"Ew! He's, like, forty! And he's married!"  
"So? He's getting a divorce! And, plus, I love him more than jelly-babies!"  
"Danielle!" Julie snapped, "He's our teacher! He's obviously just using you!"  
Danielle felt tears spring to her eyes, "No! He's not! He wouldn't do that, he's a nice guy! You're…you're just _jealous_ that nobody other than Zach Young and your mother will _ever love you_!"  
Danielle stormed out, leaving Julie, eyes popping out of her head, staring after her.

Bree was making some cookies with Orson when the doorbell rang. She glanced at Orson before making her way to the door.

"Julie," Bree smiled, opening the door. Julie stood on the doorstep, twiddling her thumbs.

"Hi, Mrs. Hodge. I was wondering if I could talk to you?"  
"Of course, come on in,"  
Julie stepped into the immaculate house, still feeling uncomfortable, that she was about to rat out her best friend.

"What is it?" Bree asked.

Orson walked in, "Hi, Julie."  
"Mr. Hodge," Julie smiled, "Erm…anyway, it's about Danielle."  
"I've been very surprised with Danielle lately. With all the history she…" Bree faded out when she saw Julie go pale at the mention of history.

"Julie?"  
Julie opened her mouth and she blurted out, "Danielle is sleeping with her history teacher!"  
Bree's mouth fell open. Orson stared at her.

"What?" he asked.

"She and Mr. Faladi, she swears they're _in love_, and she got mad at me when I said he was probably just using her."  
Bree, who had stood quietly, suddenly yelled, "_Danielle Van de Kamp!!!_"  
Julie, hearing Danielle's footsteps stomping downstairs, flung the door open and ran away. Orson closed it quietly as his step-daughter appeared.

"Yeah, Mom?" Danielle asked, popping another jelly-baby in her mouth.  
"I've just been informed that you are sleeping with your history teacher."  
Danielle's face burned bright red, "_Julie told you_?"  
Bree scowled, and decided to lie on Julie's behalf, "No. One of the cheerleader's mothers. Apparently it's no secret amongst them,"

Danielle shrugged, "Oh. Stupid cheerleaders who asked me to tell them a secret in exchange for jelly-babies…"  
"Danielle, he is your history teacher! What you are doing is…is…"  
"What?" Danielle cried, spinning around and started back upstairs, "Gross? Disgusting? I don't care, I love him!"  
"Danielle!" Bree snapped, chasing her upstairs. Orson sat next to Andrew on the sofa and sighed.

"Yep, this is what you got into," Andrew beamed. Orson rolled his eyes, "Your sister is a very interesting child. In the time I've known her, she's spied on me, fallen out of a window and off a ladder, claimed she met the Doctor, blabbed that your mom and I were engaged, got her tongue stuck to an ice-sculpture, snuck out to find you and started sleeping with her history teacher,"

Andrew winced as he heard his mother and sister yelling, "Plus she's obsessed with jelly-babies!"  
Danielle and Bree came downstairs, still fighting.

"Danielle! Danielle, he is your history teacher, and he is thirty-five years old!" Bree yelled.  
"Robert says age is just a number." Danielle retorted.  
"Don't you dare leave this house!" Bree cried.  
"You can't break us up! I love him and he loves me! And he gives me _jelly-babies when I want them!_" Danielle screamed, and she stormed out of the house, slamming the door behind her.

Danielle stepped into the cold night air, and whipped out her phone.

"Robert? Can I come over? Great…"

_Please R&R. You're right, this wasn't so funny…_


	7. Julie and Danielle and The Suicide Spoon

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please? Remember to REVIEW people:D Some lines stolen from series._

Julie and Danielle and The Suicide Spoon

Bree, Orson, Danielle, and Andrew were seated around the dining room table, eating dinner. Danielle glared down at the lamb, not eating it but silently sneaking jelly-babies into her mouth.

Orson said, "I don't know when I've tasted such tender spring lamb."  
Bree smiled at him, "Thank you, dear. Danielle, you haven't touched your dinner."

Danielle scowled at her. Of _course_ she wasn't eating! Her mother had ruined her relationship with the love of her life, Robert Faladi, her history teacher, by walking in on them!!!  
Andrew muttered quietly, "She doesn't like spring lamb. She prefers old goat."  
"I'm glad you guys think it's so funny that my life is over." Danielle snarled, accidentally putting a yellow jelly-baby in her mouth. She swallowed it and gagged.  
"Your mother was right to end that relationship. The man was your teacher and married." Orson told her.  
"He's getting a divorce!" Danielle cried for the umpteenth time.  
"Well, that hardly bolsters his suitability. Danielle, please, eat something." Orson said. Danielle stared at him, not understanding most of those words.   
"Don't worry, dear. Hunger strikes demand self-control, and as we've seen, that's hardly her strong suit." Bree sighed.  
"When are you gonna take me seriously?"  
"When you start acting like an adult."  
Andrew beamed, "Well, she sleeps with them. That's a start."  
Danielle stood up, furious, "I hate you! I hate all of you!"

Danielle threw her plate of food into the wall, and kicked her chair over. There was silence.

"Remind me to buy paper plates. We'll need them till a certain someone can be trusted with china again." Bree smiled.  
Danielle shrieked loudly and stormed upstairs.

Bree, Orson and Andrew went back to their dinner when there was a knock on the door.

"Andrew?" Bree said expectantly. Andrew groaned and went to answer it. Outside stood Julie.

"Hey, Julie,"  
"Hey, Andrew. Is Danielle here? I heard she got dumped by Mr. Faladi."  
"C'mon in,"  
Julie stepped inside and smiled at Bree and Orson.

"Hello, Julie." Bree grinned.

"Thank goodness you're here. You could cheer Danielle up." Orson said, "She's in a foul mood."  
"I'm not surprised," Julie told them, "If what I hear at school is true, Mr. Faladi dumped her in favour of you, Mr. Hodge,"  
Orson's face looked so stricken, even Andrew was tempted to hug him.

"No!" Bree cried, looking disgusted…and she did hug him, "No, my fault."  
"It was _you_ he preferred?!" Julie cried.

"No. I broke them up."  
"Did you…"  
"No."  
"Did you try…?"  
"No!"  
"How about…"  
"_No!_"

"Really?"  
"No! Look, whatever is running through your mind is _not true_!"

"Oh. Anyway, can I go up and see Danielle?"  
Bree cringed as she heard smashing and crashing from upstairs.

"Erm…sure. Could you be a dear and make sure she's only breaking her own things?"

Julie nodded and walked upstairs.  
"Danielle?" she grinned in a sing-song voice, knocking on Danielle's bedroom door. Then she heard Danielle moaning from the bathroom.

She opened it and nearly gasped when she saw her best friend lying in the bathtub, wrists slashed open and drug bottles open. Then she saw the piece of cutlery responsible.

"A spoon?" Julie muttered. Danielle moaned.

"Yeah, I'll tell 'em."

Downstairs, Bree was talking to Orson whilst Andrew ate his cake. Julie walked in and surveyed the family.

"I'm telling you, it was a deliberate snub." Bree was saying, "I waved to her and she looked right through me. True, I never bought her eldest daughter a gift…"  
"Uh, Mrs. Hodge?" Julie tried to interrupt.  
"Julie, please don't interrupt me while I'm speaking. True, I never bought her eldest daughter a gift, but you know my policy: no husband, no baby gift. Now what is it, dear?" Bree smiled.  
Julie grinned sarcastically, "Well, um, Danielle's upstairs trying to commit suicide."

Bree gave a sigh and looked knowingly at Orson who rolled his eyes. Julie looked at Andrew, who groaned, and stuffed a piece of cake in his mouth.

"Seriously!" Julie sighed, holding up the slightly bloody spoon.

Bree and Orson leapt up and ran upstairs.

Andrew looked at the suicide weapon and smirked.

"There's no rush; she's not trying that hard, apparently!"

Later, as they waited on Danielle in the hospital waiting room, Julie sat quietly, worried, whilst the Hodge family talked.

Bree and Orson were standing up while Andrew slouched in a chair, playing a hand-held video game.

"How can you sit there playing that ridiculous game? Your sister tried to kill herself. That doesn't upset you?" Bree snapped.  
"She tried to slit her wrists with a spoon. How upset do you want me to be?" Andrew smirked.  
"Mrs. Hodge?" the doctor said, entering the room.  
"Is my daughter all right?" Bree demanded.   
"She's a little groggy, but she'll be fine. The wounds are fairly superficial." the doctor told them.  
"So's the patient." Andrew muttered.  
"We'll release her tonight, but you understand that in cases like this, counselling is mandatory." the doctor said.  
"Of course. We'll get her all the help she needs." Bree said.  
"She is resisting our efforts to pump her stomach. She says she only took three sedatives." Dr. Craig said.  
Andrew grinned "She's disoriented. Pump her."  
"Andrew!" Bree snapped.

She paused, and then turned to the doctor.

"Pump her."

The doctor nodded and left.

"They're sticking a tube down her throat. Do you still think this is funny?" Bree hissed.  
Andrew shook his head, "Mom, this was a half-assed bid for attention."  
Bree glared at him "This was a cry for help and if we don't listen, the next time she could do something even more dangerous."  
Andrew snorted, "Yeah, next time she might jump off the porch."  
Orson suddenly snapped, "Will you stop it! Suicide is the worst thing that can happen to a family! I will not have it made light of!"  
Bree hurriedly stood up to calm Orson down, "Orson's right. We need to support each other as a family. In fact, I say we all go for counselling."

Julie looked around, "You mean _them_, not me, right?"

"Yes, Julie!"

"Good."

Bree looked at Orson, who nodded. At that moment, a nurse came in.

"Mrs. Hodge?" she smiled, "Danielle is refusing to have her stomach pumped until she talks to Julie Mayer."  
Julie raised her head. Andrew, Bree, and Orson all glanced at her.

"Okay…"

Julie got up to follow the nurse to Danielle's room.

"Julie," Danielle smiled weakly when she saw her friend.

Julie sat next to her, "Danielle, why would you…?"  
"It was a spoon, damn it!"  
"I know," Julie grinned.

"Anyway, Julie. I need to say something. If…if something does happen to me…"  
"No! Danielle, don't say that!" Julie snapped, shiny eyed, "You're not going to _ever_ try this again!"

"But if something happens to me, in the future or right now, Julie Mayer…"  
Julie looked at her, expectantly.

"_You_ get my jelly-babies." sobbed Danielle.

Julie burst into tears, and she hugged her friend. The doctor came in and asked Julie to leave. Julie, still crying, left the room and went to where the Hodge family stood.

"Julie?" Bree asked, looking at Julie's tear streaked face.  
"Y-y-y-y-yes?" Julie stammered, wiping tears off of her face.

"What's wrong?" she asked, as Andrew put his arm around Julie.

"She just said something so…so _beautiful_!" Julie sobbed, burying her face in Andrew's shoulder.

"You get the jelly-babies if something happens?" Orson asked.

"Uh-huh." Julie nodded.

"And you're crying?"  
"Uh-huh."  
Andrew hugged Julie, as she kept sobbing, and Bree and Orson stepped aside.

"Maybe the sadness of the situation just caught up with her." Bree suggested.

"If not, she's an incredibly sad little girl," Orson muttered. Bree rolled her eyes.

"That's my daughter's best friend you're talking about."  
"Well, they're a perfect match,"  
Bree swatted him playfully and he leant down and kissed her romantically.

_Aww__! Such a romantic ending! __ Please R&R. _


	8. Julie and Danielle and The Big Bang

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please? Sorry for grammical errors :)_

_Thanks to my sister who helped write this. This is the 8__th__ part and hopefully entertaining. _

Julie and Danielle and The Big Bang

Julie walked around the supermarket, fuming. First, her mother had expected her to go get her some toothpaste and mouthwash for her trip to Paris with her new boyfriend Ian, and then she yelled at her because she found a beer can Austin Britt had had. Then, the boy himself had appeared and made fun of her. The jerk was still tailing her now!  
She looked ahead and saw Danielle Van de Kamp at the candy section, stuffing jelly-babies packets in her pockets. She took this opputunity to run away from Austin.

"Danielle?!" she cried, but still smiling, "That's illegal!"

Danielle started to deny it, then paused and cried, "I can't help it! They don't deserve to be displayed! They were calling to me! _Help us, Danielle, please_!"

Julie frowned, "Okay…" and then she giggled and hugged her friend.

Then, there was a far-off noise, like a bang.

"Arrgh!" Danielle cried, "My ears popped!"

Julie stared at her, then Harvey Bigsby, the store manager, ran by. His wife, Carolyn, followed shortly, with a gun.

"OhmiGod!" Julie cried, ignoring Danielle's blabbering about ears popping and aeroplanes. Harvey quickly escaped into his office, with Edie Britt, and locked the door. Carolyn hammered on the door, and turned, pointing a gun at the teenagers. "Stop! Don't move! No-one goes _anywhere_!" she shouted, and Julie gulped, Austin sat on the floor, and Danielle gasped as the jelly-babies fell out of her hand and Carolyn kicked them under a shelf.

"No!" she shrieked, falling to her knees and shouting to the heavens, "Take me, but not them! They're so young! Why?!"

Then she fainted.

**-The Outside World-**

Mrs. McCluskey knocked on Bree Hodge's door.

"Hi, Mrs. McCluskey," smiled Bree, answering.

"Hello, Bree." she smiled, "Did you hear?"  
Behind Bree, Gabrielle Solis and Susan Mayer appeared.

"What, Mrs. McCluskey?" Bree asked.  
"At the supermarket, there's a hostage situation! Some crazy woman with a gun!"  
Bree gasped, "Oh my God!"  
"What?" Gabrielle asked as Bree clasped the door.

Bree turned to her, her face stricken.

"Danielle went there."  
Gabrielle gasped, as Susan remembered something, "So did Julie."  
Orson appeared behind the women, "Are we having a party, Bree?"  
Bree randomly hugged him, "Orson!"  
Orson wrapped his arms around her as she started sobbing.

"Danielle's at the super market in the middle of a hostage situation along with Julie," Gabrielle informed, hugging Susan who was also in tears.

Gabrielle and Orson glanced down at the sobbing women they were cradling and sighed, as Karen McCluskey slowly backed away.

Tom Scavo appeared in McCluskey's place, with five kids in tow (Porter, Preston, Parker, Penny and Kayla!).

"Hi guys…" Tom faulted at the sight, "Erm…would you look after the kids? I have a dentist appointment, and Lynette is taking her sweet time at the super market!"  
Andrew came downstairs and frowned, "Okay…"  
Gabrielle quickly explained what was wrong and Tom burst into tears and grabbed Andrew.  
"Okay…" Andrew muttered, "Is anyone else _really_ aroused by this?"  
Everyone glared at him and Tom quickly backed away.

"I'll look after the kids," Gabrielle offered, "You, Bree, Susan and Orson! You'd better go!"  
They all piled in Bree's car, and Andrew and Gabrielle stared at the kids, and the kids stared right back.  
"I'm worried."  
"Me too."

And the children grinned evilly...even the baby.

**-Back at The Supermarket-**

Julie fanned Danielle's face and looked at the hostages: Austin, Lynette Scavo, Nora Huntington, Danielle, herself, the new neighbour, Art, and numerous others. Danielle was starting to wake up.  
"She alright?" Carolyn snapped. Julie nodded. Danielle sat up.

"Julie?" she whispered, "What's going on?"  
Julie was about to explain when Carolyn cut across her.

"You." she snapped, pointing at her, "I want you to go look at the crowd."  
Julie frowned, "Why? Am I supposed to wave and do a pep rally dance?"  
"No! I want to see how many people are out there, and to let them know you are all okay."  
"I'm not leaving Danielle!"  
Carolyn brandished her gun, so Julie took off down the aisles and to the front door. She gasped as she saw the crowds. She could see police cars and ambulances, and hundreds of civilians standing behind barriers. The moment she appeared, all the journalists turned and started yelling, and she saw her mother and Mrs and Mr Hodge running towards the door.

"Mom!" Julie yelled.  
"Julie!" Susan yelled, running into the very clean glass.

"Ow…"  
"Julie!" Bree cried, "Is Danielle okay?"  
Julie nodded and was about to talk when she felt a cold hand clasp across her mouth. She turned her head to see Carolyn waving at all the people.

"_Carolyn_!" yelled Susan, "Let her go!"  
Carolyn just frowned and dragged Julie away. The last glimpse Julie got of Susan was police officers dragging her away, and she was still screaming her daughter's name.

Julie started muttering into Carolyn's hand and then had an idea. And she stuck out her tongue.

"Ew! Gross!" Carolyn gasped, dropping Julie. Julie beamed at her and crawled back over to Danielle. They saw Mrs. Scavo and Nora whispering in hush-hush tones.

"Hey!" Carolyn snapped, pointing her gun at the two, "Shush!"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. We'll, we'll be quiet." Lynette stammered.  
Carolyn glared at them, "You and your friend are really starting to bug me."  
"She's not my friend." Lynette snapped harshly.  
Nora looked at her, hurt, and then hissed, "She's trying to steal my kid."  
"Nora, _shut up_!" Lynette cried.  
"Is that true?" demanded Carolyn.  
Lynette shook her head, "No! I, we're, we have, we're sharing custody, and then, she tried to seduce my husband, so…"  
Carolyn raised an eyebrow, "She put the moves on your husband? Why didn't you say so?"

She turned the gun on Nora and released the trigger. The other customers gasped and shrieked as the bullet hit Nora in the chest.

**-The Outside World-**

An almighty bang echoed around the parking lot. Susan and Bree grabbed at each other and Tom stood ridged. Reporters were running this way and that.

"Oh!" Bree whispered, covering her mouth. Orson put her arm around her. A limo drove into the parking lot and Ian leapt out and ran over. Susan saw him and ran to meet him.

"Ian!" she sobbed, "She…Julie…I…"  
"I saw it on the news," Ian whispered, brushing some hair out of her face, "It'll be okay, Susan. She'll be fine."

**-Back at The Supermarket-**

Julie and Danielle watched in horror as Lynette and Art (the new neighbour) worked on cleaning Nora's wound.

"Maybe a jelly-baby will cheer her up?"  
"Danielle," Julie snapped. She glanced at Austin, who was humming a show-tune to himself.

"How can you be so calm?" she demanded, leaning over Danielle.

"Because," he smiled, "None of us are going to die today."  
Nora moaned loudly.

"Except her," Austin corrected himself. Julie smiled and leant in and kissed him. Danielle stared with a mix of disgust and happiness on her face.  
As she pulled away, Austin asked, "What was that for?"  
"Just in case you're wrong," Julie grinned, and she sat upright.

They looked back at Nora and Lynette, where Nora was whispering something to Lynette. Lynette was sobbing as Nora's head fell back. She was dead.

Lynette looked up at Carolyn, with wide eyes and blood stained hands. Danielle slowly and discreetly crawled over to Lynette and whispered, "Mrs. Scavo?"  
But Lynette didn't notice.

"Oh, don't look at me that way. You know you wanted her dead." Carolyn snapped.  
Lynette sobbed loudly, "How can you say that?"  
"Well, you told me about her and your husband after I made it pretty clear where I stand on whores."  
"I did not want this. Don't you dare say that I wanted this." Lynette hissed  
"Shut up!" Carolyn yelled.

"No, I will not shut up! What's the matter with you?!" Lynette yelled back, getting to her feet.  
"Have you not been paying attention? My husband cheated on me!"  
"Who cares?! Who cares? We all have pain! Everyone in here has pain, but we deal with it! We swallow it and get going with our lives! What we don't do is go around shooting strangers!"  
"She deserved it!"  
"Well, maybe you deserved to be cheated on!" Lynette shrieked.

Carolyn's twisted face turned into a look of shock and anger.

"I'm, I'm, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that." Lynette whispered  
"Yeah, you shouldn't have." Carolyn hissed. And she raised the gun.

And shot.

**-The Outside World-**

Another shot rang around the parking lot. And shortly after, a scream followed. Bree and Susan stood still, numb from worry. Orson and Ian tried to comfort them, but they barely noticed their futile efforts.

"They'll be okay," Orson whispered, kissing the top of Bree's head.

"I'm not sure," Bree retorted, "Danielle would have probably annoyed Carolyn by going on about jelly-babies,"  
Bree's face crumbled again, "I'm going to miss those jelly-baby rambles,"  
Orson hugged her close to him, "She's going to be fine! You wait for the moment she walks through those doors."  
Susan smiled at the couple, before fixing her eyes back on the supermarket, heart thumping.

_Two shots. How am I supposed to know one of them wasn't for Julie?_

**-Back at The Supermarket-**

Danielle lay on the floor, as the events of what had happened replayed in her mind.

"_No. You shouldn't have." Carolyn hissed. And she raised the gun._

_And shot._

_Time went in slow motion. Lynette stood, eyes closed, waiting for the bullet. Danielle bit her lip and leapt in front of Lynette and the bullet buried deep into her shoulder. She cried out in pain and crashed to the floor. Julie screamed loudly. Lynette stared at Bree's daughter, who lay, writhing in agony on the floor. She and Julie both rushed to her side. Carolyn stared in shock, and, in this moment of vulnerability, Austin tackled her around the knees._

"…Danielle!" Julie's thick voice cut into her thoughts. She looked at her friend, who still had tears streaming down her face.

"Danielle, why did you do that?" Lynette whispered.

"Bravery? Sugar rush?" Danielle shrugged, and then felt a blinding pain in her shoulder, "Or maybe I couldn't stand the thought of those boys waking up without a mommy."  
Lynette pushed another wad of paper against Danielle's wound. There was a bang. They looked up to see a woman, clutching the gun, had shot Carolyn in the head. There was a moment of silence until the office door opened and Harvey and Edie walked out. Harvey took command of the situation, telling everyone to stay put. ("_Now_ he's brave," Edie muttered) He asked Julie to go unlock the doors, and he tossed her a key. She grabbed it and walked to the doors. Everyone outside seemed to go quiet when she appeared, waving the key. She unlocked the doors and stepped out into fresh air.  
She expected a surge of people, but instead some officers restrained the crowd and the chief ran to her.  
"Hi,"  
"Hello," Julie whispered.

"What's your name?"  
"Julie Mayer."  
"Is anyone in there hurt?"  
Julie nodded numbly. The chief signalled for some ambulance workers to come with him, leaving Julie alone. Then she saw a figure running towards her, kicking off her high heels.

"Julie!" shrieked Susan, wrapping her arms around her child. Julie clung to her tightly. Then, Bree, Orson, Tom and Ian came up behind Susan.  
"Julie!" Bree cried, but before she could ask anything, Tom butted in.

"Is Lynette okay?"  
Julie nodded. Bree pushed him aside.

"And Danielle?"  
Julie was about to answer when the ambulance workers came out with a stretcher, which Danielle lay on. Bree gasped loudly as she saw the gaping red wound on her shoulder.

"Danielle?" she whispered, running to the stretcher.

"Momma?" Danielle smiled. Bree kissed Danielle's forehead.

Bree, Danielle and Orson all went off and were loaded into the ambulance. Susan flung her arms around Julie again as Lynette came out.

"Tom!" she cried, hugging her husband. Tom squeezed her back and then he kissed her. Julie averted her eyes and looked at her mom.

"Mom," she whispered, "Nora and Carolyn are dead."  
Susan didn't seem to care; she was just so happy her daughter got back safe.

**-Later-**

Julie sat next to Danielle's bed, ignoring her babble about jelly-babies. Her wound had been cleared up, the bullet removed, and Bree had barely left her daughter's side. Right now, Orson sat on the sofa across the room, with his wife's head on his lap while she snoozed in peace.

"Can you believe it, Julie," Danielle whispered, "I saved Lynette's life. I'm a heroine."  
"You sure are," Julie smiled.

"I want to thank _you_, Julie." Danielle said.

"Why?"  
"I'd be _dead_ if it weren't for you!"  
"No you wouldn't!"  
Danielle shrugged, "But still. Thanks."  
Julie smiled and the best friends hugged. They had survived almost everything, including a hostage situation, and the Doctor.

_Hope you enjoyed! Please Review! All comments welcome!_


	9. Julie and Danielle and Austin

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do. __This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please? __Thanks to my sister who helped write this. This is the 9__th__ part and hopefully entertaining., and it is a little while after the last chap.!_ _This is focused more on JULIE!_

Julie and Danielle and Austin

Julie sat on a fence, next to Danielle.

"…and Mom was freaking out just because me and Austin are together now!" Julie was moaning. Danielle nodded.

"Mothers!" she joked, "They always find a way to hate our boyfriends."  
Julie grinned, "The thing is, I like Austin a lot but…I'm worried he _wants_ something more from me!"  
"What?"  
"Y'know…"  
"Jelly-babies?"  
"No! Erm, something…" Julie shrugged, "That I don't want to give up yet!"  
Danielle nodded, "_Ohhh_! You've never done it with anyone!"  
Julie blushed, "Yeah. And I don't know if I'll do it with Austin."  
Danielle smiled, "Honey, if he isn't pressuring you, just calm down,"

"But what if he goes with someone else?"  
Danielle felt her stomach twist but she shrugged it off, "He wouldn't! He's a good guy!"

Danielle frowned, "But don't do anything until he offers you jelly-babies…"  
Julie burst out laughing.

"_Jelly-babies_?"  
"Okay! I get it! You don't like 'em like I do!"

Although she pretended to pass it off and ignore it, the thought of Austin in another girl's arms bothered Julie. And that night, she had a terrible dream about it.

_Austin answered the door, his face handsome in the moonlight._

"_Hi," he smiled, "I thought you'd never arrive."  
She smiled at him, "I'm fashionably late. Did you see what's-her-face again today?"  
Austin nodded, "Julie. And I did. She is my girlfriend!"  
"What does that make me?"  
He smiled at her, hand in hers, "My best friend?"  
She grinned back at him, showing pearly white teeth. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Austin opened the door wider and she stepped in. Then, he leaned in to kiss…_

Julie awoke with a start, "Holy shi--"  
"Julie!" her mom yelled, "Breakfast!"  
Julie sighed and got out of bed. The girl in her dream: blurred face, no name, she could be anyone!  
She got downstairs and saw her mom getting milk out of the fridge, and Ian and Danielle sitting at the table.

"Danielle?" Julie muttered, rubbing her eyes.

"Morning, sleepy-head!" she grinned, "I guess you forgot we had an early shopping date!"  
"Oh…" Julie frowned, grabbing a plate of pancakes, "I did. Sorry."  
Danielle shrugged, "It's okay. I got some of your mom's--"  
Ian cleared his throat. Danielle sighed.

"--I mean, Ian's pancakes."

Julie glanced at Danielle's pancake, which had red, green and orange lumps in.

"She got here in time to put jelly-babies in," Ian said, shrugging.

Danielle grinned and ate the last forkful of pancake.

"Well, I'll be off then. See you around, Mr. Hainesworth and Mrs. Mayer. Julie, I'll call you tonight."  
Danielle opened the door, waved one last time and then left, closing the door behind her. Ian glanced at Julie.

"She's an odd child,"  
Julie rolled her eyes, "She is not!"  
Susan sat next to Ian, "She's obsessed with jelly-babies, and she had an affair with her history teacher,"  
Julie frowned, "How do you…?"  
Susan grinned, "Bree blabbed at poker."  
Julie nodded, "Huh. Anyways, Danielle is a good friend. She's my_ best _friend, so leave off, you two,"  
Julie walked back upstairs. Ian stared at Susan.

"Who knew that a girl like _Julie_ could be friends with a girl like _Danielle_?"  
Susan shrugged and kissed him.

Julie sat in the park, waiting for Austin. She didn't want to lose him, yet she wasn't sure she was ready. She had to think fast as she could see him coming down the path. She leaned forward and waved at him, before she leaned back into her spot of solitude, behind a big boulder. Then, she made up her mind.

_**Later**_

Julie and Austin were lying on the ground, kissing. Austin pulled away.

"Why'd you stop?" Julie asked.

"Well, uh, it's getting late. I got your blouse unbuttoned. That's usually when we call it a night."  
"Do you wanna call it a night?" Julie asked timidly.  
"What, do you wanna grab a pizza or something?"

Julie shook her head and kissed him.

"I wanna do what...you wanna do."  
"Well...you know what I wanna do."  
"Well, okay." Julie said.  
"Are you sure?" Austin asked, visibly concerned.  
"Yeah, I'm sure."

Julie pulled him back down and kissed him again, prepared for what was next.

"You gave in," Danielle tutted, putting a cherry on her ice cream, "You gave in and did it in the park…not that I'm not impressed."  
Julie grinned, "It was _amazing_! Like an explosion throughout my body."

"It would've been better with jelly-babies,"  
"No! No, no! But, anyway, now I can see why you did it for the first time with Mr. Faladi!"  
"Erm…" Danielle bit her lip, "Actually it was Matthew Applewhite,"  
"Oh," Julie frowned, "Can't say I'm not surprised, he was hot,"  
Danielle nodded, "Yeah. And you know what? So's Austin!"  
Julie gasped, and hugged her, "Oh, I knew you'd be supportive! My mom would _freak_!"

Danielle nodded, "Uh-huh."  
"You okay? You sound funny."  
"Yeah, I'm fine,"

**LATER**

"Have you lost your _mind_? I am not getting you the pill." Edie cried.

"Aunt Edie, Julie and I are in love." Austin insisted.

Edie laughed, pouring another brandy, "Oh, please. It's not love you're feeling. It's hormones."

"That's not true."

"Okay, fine. If you want to...express your love, you don't need to go all the way. Kiss. Touch. Rub. I mean, whatever happened to heavy petting? It's so underrated." Edie muttered.

"That's your advice?" Austin scoffed.

"Well, I'm sorry. I've never been good at getting people not to have sex."

"So you're not gonna help us?" Julie asked.

"Julie, if I do this, your mother would have my head. You should be talking to her." Edie sighed.

"I can't talk to her. The whole idea of this completely freaks her out. She started screaming 'sex kills.'"

"Hmm, so now it's all in my lap. God, she pisses me off. Look, how about I spring for a box of condoms? Will that get you two off my back?" Edie asked.

"Condoms are only eighty-five percent effective."

"Is that true? Damn. I thought I could coast all the way to menopause."

"Look, we're gonna have sex whether you help us or not."

Julie sighed, "We're just trying to be responsible."

Edie sat, looking thoughtful for a moment, "Hmm. All right. But just so you know, the responsible thing is to abstain from sex and focus on your studies. There. I said it out loud, just in case anybody asks."

Julie grinned broadly, "Thanks, Edie."  
Edie shrugged, finishing her drink in one, "Yeah, yeah. Whatever!"

Later that day, Julie felt like a huge weight was lifted off her shoulders. She had slept with Austin, therefore there would be no other girl. Except…

Julie, who had been grinning out the window at Austin's home, suddenly frowned. They had been dating for a while before she agreed to sleeping with him. What if there _was _another girl? She suddenly had a brainwave.

"I've been getting a lot of these, it's Danielle's turn," she muttered. But she decided to press on. She left her home and looked up at Edie's home. A girl was ringing the door bell. Austin answered.

_"Hi," he smiled, "I thought you'd never arrive."  
She smiled at him, "I'm fashionably late. Did you see Julie again today?"_

Julie walked closer to Edie's house. She hid behind a tree at hearing distance._  
Austin nodded, "I did. She is my girlfriend!"  
"What does that make me?"  
He smiled at her, hand in hers, "My best friend?"  
She grinned back at him, showing pearly white teeth. She tucked a strand of brunette hair behind her ear. Austin opened the door wider and she stepped in. Then, he leaned in to kiss her._

And this time, it wasn't a dream.

Julie watched Austin kiss Danielle and bring her into the house. Julie walked along to the front door, looking in the window into the living room, where they were lying on the sofa, making out. Julie felt tears prickle at her eyes, and she turned away as they spilt over.  
"What…a…_bitch…_" Julie hissed. Then, she went and hammered on the front door.

Austin answered, and when he saw her his eyes filled with fear, "Julie?"  
"Austin. And where's Danielle?" Julie snapped, shoving Austin and stepping into the house. Danielle was hiding behind a chair.

"_You_…" Julie cried. Danielle stood up.

"Hi! Julie. I just came over to help Austin study!"  
Julie scoffed, "Whatever! You do remember how dumb you are, right?"  
Danielle looked hurt, "Hey!"  
"And, Austin!" Julie spun around, "I sleep with you. You are my first _ever_! And I find you hopping into bed with my best friend?! You are a sick, sick…sick…_nymphomaniac!_!"  
Julie ran towards the door and Austin grabbed her arm, "Julie, look…"  
Julie spun around and smacked her fist into his _perfect_ face. He fell to the floor, blood pouring from his nose. Julie turned her tear-stained face to Danielle.

Danielle moved towards her, "Julie, please…"  
"No…" Julie whispered, arm falling, calmer to her childhood friend, "Just stay away…"  
Julie ran from the house, crying. She ran into her house, where her mother, Mrs. Scavo and Mrs. Solis stood.

"Julie?" Susan asked. Julie turned her head away.

"Mom?" she muttered, shakily.  
"Julie, are you okay?"  
Julie stood still. She could almost see her mother's concerned face, and Mrs. Scavo's look of worry, and Mrs. Solis' look of interest.

"Fine," Julie hissed.

"Julie, are you sure?" Mrs Scavo asked.

"Mom…" Julie sighed, "You don't like Mrs. Hodge anymore, right?"  
"I like her, she just is mad at me. Why?"  
Julie bit her lip, "Because, I _hate_ Danielle Van de Kamp."  
Julie heard the three women splutter their coffee.

"Aw, crap."  
"My _dress_!"  
"My _Julie_! Why, Julie?"  
Julie turned her tear stained face towards them.

"I loved Austin Britt. I dated him, tutored him, had sex with him for the _first time_…"  
The women spluttered yet again, "What?"  
"…and all this time, he was sleeping with Danielle." Julie finished, "I hate them both!"  
"Oh, Julie," Susan started, moving towards her.

"_Don't!_" Julie yelled, running upstairs.

Susan turned to stare at Lynette and Gabrielle. Lynette had her eyes closed and hands clasped together.

"What are you doing?"  
"Praying!"  
"What for?"  
"Hoping Penny stays a baby forever!" Lynette snapped, "Or at least doesn't do it until she's 40!"  
Lynette went back to praying. Susan and Gabby went silent as they heard Julie ripping things up, and smashing things.

The next morning, when Susan went upstairs and took Julie's bin out of her room, she found a torn up picture of Austin and a scrapbook. When she opened the scrapbook, she found it was entitled, _Julie and Danielle: Friends Forever!_

_Hope you enjoyed! Please R&R! All comments welcome! And sorry this one was NOT FUNNY but at least there are some serious aspects!_


	10. Julie and Danielle's Reunion

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do. __This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please?__ Oh, and this chapter mentions a lot of things that were going on in the actual series, but haven't been explained, so if you watch the series, you'll know what's going on. This is the 10__th__ part and hopefully entertaining. Review, please!_

Julie and Danielle's Reunion

_BEEP "Hi, Julie. It's me again! Please answer me…"  
BEEP "Come on Julie! This is getting ridiculous! I'm really sorry…"  
BEEP "Julie, he offered me jelly-babies, god dammit…!" _

The messages from Danielle just kept flooding in, but Julie didn't have the strength, patience or joy to answer them. She was even too lazy and unhappy to get out of bed. Her mother called her for dinner, but Julie just lay in bed, pretending to be asleep. Susan often came up but Julie didn't look at her or talk to her. She felt like too much of a disgrace.

Down Wisteria Lane, another teenage girl was again leaving a message on her best friend's answering machine.  
"…Okay. Bye," Danielle finished up, hanging the phone up.

"Danielle?" Bree poked her head around the door, "Dinner's ready."  
"I'm not hungry,"

"C'mon honey. You didn't even come down for breakfast this morning."

"So?"  
Bree sighed and sat down next to her, "I'll let you have jelly-babies with your dinner?"  
Danielle's eyes flickered, but she turned her head away, "Don't want no jelly-babies."  
"_What_?" Bree gasped, putting her hand on her heart, "Are you really Danielle?"  
"Oi," Danielle muttered, slightly offended.

"Sweetie, what's wrong?"

"Julie ignored me at school today. She's still mad that I was seeing Austin behind her back,"  
"_What_? You were the other woman?"

"You could say that," Danielle shrugged.  
"Oh, Danielle," Bree sighed, "After everything I went through with your dad,"  
"_I know, Mom!_" Danielle snapped, "And, now I think of it, I'm not going to eat jelly-babies until Julie is my friend again."  
"Danielle!"  
"I know! Big step,"  
Bree sighed, and kissed her daughter's head before leaving. She didn't have time to make Danielle change her mind. She had bigger things on her mind. Bree walked into her bedroom and glared at the set of teeth that still lay on her duvet.

"Oh, my," Bree pulled a face as she swept them all into the little velvet bag and hid them in a drawer.

* * *

Susan sat at her desk, pondering over many things.

_What to do about Julie?_

_Mike needs a better lawyer. But I don't have the money. What to do?_

_Would Ian's feelings be hurt?_

_How do I get Bree to forgive me?_

As if she knew Susan was thinking about her, Bree knocked on the door.

"Bree," Susan said in surprise, upon opening the door.

"Susan," Bree said shortly, "I need to talk to you,"  
Susan smiled smugly as she let the redhead in. _She was probably here to talk about renewing our friendship, _Susan thought.

"Susan, Danielle and Julie…"

_Oh._

"They have been best friends for the longest time, and I know Danielle made a mistake…"  
"Mistake?" Susan scoffed, "She was the other woman."  
"I know. But, if you are going to be unreasonable about discussing this, I'm going to speak to Julie," Bree snapped, "Where is she?"  
"Upstairs."  
Bree smiled and walked upstairs. Upon knocking on Julie's door, she heard a faint voice call, "Go away, Mom,"  
"Actually, Julie," Bree answered, "I'm not your mother,"  
The door opened slightly to reveal Julie in her pajamas with a tear streaked face, "Mrs. Hodge,"  
Bree smiled, "Hello, Julie. I was wondering if I could talk to you for a moment,"  
Julie shrugged and opened her door to let Bree in.  
"Can I help you?"  
Bree glanced around the neat room and perched on Julie's bed, "I need to talk to you about Danielle…"  
"Oh," Julie sighed.

"She is just as miserable as you are," Bree told her, "She thinks -- knows -- she's lost her best friend and she's distraught,"  
"How distraught?" Julie asked.

Bree bit her lip, "She says, until you guys are friends again, she's not going to eat jelly-babies."  
"_What_?" Julie yelped, "But she's been eating them almost non stop for…what, a decade? She can't go cold-turkey!"  
Bree smiled, "See, you still care for her."  
Julie sighed, "Of course I do. I want to forgive her, Mrs. Hodge, but I keep seeing her with Austin and it makes me furious."  
Bree nodded sadly, "Sweetie, I know what it feels like to be cheated on…"  
Julie raised her eyebrows, remembering the infamous affair of Rex Van de Kamp, Bree's first husband, with Maisy Gibbons.  
"…but I think, if I could forgive Rex, you can forgive Danielle,"  
"How?"  
Bree's smile faltered, "Because, Danielle is your best friend. Just focus on the good memories you've had with her. You know deep down she's a good person. You can forgive her."

Julie smiled up at her, "Y'know, I think I already kinda have. She is my best friend after all."  
"Oh, good," Bree cried, standing up, "I _never_ thought I could fix this,"  
Julie grinned and randomly hugged her, "Thank you, Mrs. Hodge!"  
Bree looked surprised for a moment before hugging her back, "Erm…that's okay, Julie. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have muffins in the oven back home,"  
Bree bid goodbye to Julie and walked back downstairs.  
"Well?" Susan asked.

"Looks like Julie and Danielle will be okay," Bree answered.

Susan smiled fleetingly at her old friend, "Thanks Bree,"  
Bree nodded curtly, "Anytime," and she left. Susan sighed as Julie came downstairs.  
"Mom! Mrs. Hodge helped me out big time! I think I can get over Danielle's betrayal!"  
Susan put an arm around Julie, "Well, at least one Van de Kamp girl will be friends with a Mayer girl,"  
Julie nodded, "Still not sorted things out with Bree?"

Susan laughed shrilly, "Honey, we're not going to sort things out unless one of us owns a time machine…"  
"You should've met the Doctor…"  
"Julie."  
"He's _real_, I tell you!! _Real!!_"

* * *

Danielle sat at the kitchen table. She could smell her mother's muffins. _Yum_.

Andrew sat eating a bowl of ice cream and chocolate sauce. _Yum yum_.

Orson was unpacking some groceries and he was holding a tin of brownies. _Yum yum yum_.

And in front of her there was her collection of jelly-babies. _Yum yum yum yum yum_!!

But she was about to throw them away (_No!_) as it seemed she and Julie were never going to make up. She gathered them all in her arms and moved towards the trash can. Orson and Andrew stared at her. Her mother was sipping coffee with a faint smile on her lips. She must be happy Danielle's obsession was over.  
"Aren't you going to stop me?" Danielle said to no one in particular, but she glared at her mother.

"I don't have to," Bree grinned, and at that moment, Julie Mayer burst in.

"_Danielle_!"  
"_Julie_?"  
Julie moved Danielle away from the trash can, "Danielle, I'm sorry I ignored you, but I was hurt. But I'm over it now!"  
Danielle dropped her jelly-babies on the floor, "I'm sorry I was the other woman in your relationship and was the one providing sex."  
"_What?_"  
"Mom! Anyways, I'm sorry!"  
"I'm sorry too!"  
Julie and Danielle hugged. Andrew grinned broadly; Orson looked puzzled while Bree looked disgusted.

"You were sleeping with Austin?!"  
"Mom, you're ruining the moment!"

* * *

_Aww! Sweet!...sorta. Hope you enjoyed! Please Review! All comments welcome! _


	11. Julie and Danielle Have AnotherAdventure

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please?_

_This is the 11__th__ part and hopefully entertaining. It is shortly after the episode _Come Play Wiz Me_ where Alma rapes Orson. God, that sounded weird._

Julie and Danielle Have Another Adventure

Julie yawned loudly.

"Morning!"  
Julie looked up and saw Danielle standing over her, "Why am I here?"  
"We had a sleepover. And we _didn't sneak out_! Though we did get sugar-rushes."  
Julie glanced at the clock, "_Six in the morning_? Goodnight, Danielle!"  
Julie rolled over and fell off her bed.

"Ha."

Danielle was still giggling as she helped her friend to her feet.

"Let's go get you some coffee, Jules."  
"B-b-b-b-b-b-b-but, I'm tired."  
"C'mon, Julie. Let's go ask Mom and Orson if they want a cup."  
Julie got up and trudged after Danielle. She looked at Bree and Orson's bedroom door, which was slightly ajar. They glanced at each other, shrugged, bent down and peered in. Orson was fast asleep, and Bree was sitting in bed with a glass of water. A few moments passed, and then Bree suddenly tipped the water over Orson's face.

Orson woke up, spluttering.

"I'm sorry, but you've been out cold for ten hours, and we need to talk!" Bree snapped.

It took a moment or two, or perhaps fifteen minutes, but soon Orson was more awake, and he had told Bree what he remembered about whatever she was talking about.

"…I remember drinking the scotch and then Alma suddenly sitting up. But after that, nothing."

Bree sighed, "Oh, dear. I'm not sure how to tell you this, but...after Alma knocked you out, she assaulted you."

Julie spluttered, so Danielle had to push her off-balance to shut her up.

Orson ran his hands over his chest, "Where?"

"Sexually. She had sex with you." Bree cried. This time, both girls had to stifle giggles.

"But that's impossible."

"Your drink was laced with pills for...erectile dysfunction."

More laughter.

"But I was dead to the world."

"No, dear, you were dead to the waist." Bree told him.

Julie ran along the hall into the bathroom and Danielle heard her peals of laughter. Wow, underneath that good girl, looks-after-everything-responsibly exterior was a real..._immarture _child!

"I had sex with Alma, and I wasn't even conscious? How reminiscent of our marriage."

"Okay, this is no joke. She raped you, and your mother helped…."  
"Oh my God!" Danielle gasped as Julie returned, "Psycho mom!"  
"…Look, after we get dressed, we're going to the police."

"I can't do that!"

"Orson, I know you're embarrassed, but what they did to you was a crime."

"No, I can't go to the police. Not now, not ever."

"Orson, your ex-wife is a homicidal rapist, and your mother is straight out of _I, Claudius._ Why do you refuse to deal with them?"  
"_I, Claudius_ is actually a good book. He would like it," Julie muttered.

"And Orson's mom would fit right in," Danielle shrugged.

"I think it's time I told you about the night Monique Polier died." Orson whispered, and there was silence as he moved towards the door. A silence broken by a cry from Danielle.

"_Dun, dun, duuuuuuuuun!_"  
"What?" Orson cried, flinging the door open. Danielle and Julie stared up at him, still on their knees, before they both lost balance and fell over.  
"Ow."  
"Julie, that's _my foot_!"

"Were you two listening?" Orson demanded.

"No," Danielle lied smoothly, getting up, "So Orson, we were going to get some coffee. Do you want some, or do you already feel _perky_ this morning?"   
Julie burst out laughing and was actually rolling on the floor in laughter.

Orson scowled, and looked at Bree, "Eavesdroppers."  
Bree was grinning cheekily, "_Do_ you, Orson? Answer her question. It's only polite."  
As Danielle gave her mother the thumbs up, Orson slammed the door.

"_Ow_! My _other foot_!"

"Sorry," Orson yelled.

"Coffee?" Julie asked.

"Sure," Danielle answered, and they went downstairs.

* * *

_**Later**_

Bree lay on her bed, staring into space. Orson sat next to her, and sighed.

"Bree…"

"Please don't touch me."

"All this time, you've said you wanted the truth."

"That's before I knew what it was."

"You see, that's why I've tried to protect you from this." Orson cried.

Bree glared at him, "Yeah, but you weren't just trying to protect me, were you?"

"What do you want me to do?"

"Exonerate Mike. How could you stand by and let an innocent man be dragged off to prison?" Bree demanded.

"You think I haven't felt terrible?"

"And this, after he'd been in a coma because some lunatic ran him over."

Orson took a moment to look offended, but quickly changed his expression, "He has had a rough year. I wanna help Mike. How do I do that without implicating myself? I could go to jail."

"I don't care if you go to jail. You have done a horrible thing, and you have to make it right. I mean it, Orson. If you don't fix this, I will." Bree snapped.

Orson sighed, "Well, I guess I'm in no position to argue."

"No, you're not."

* * *

Julie and Danielle sat at the kitchen counter, eating waffles when Andrew ran down.  
"Girls!"  
Danielle waved at him, "Hi, Andrew. Wow, love the teddy pyjamas. No bunny slippers?"  
Julie smirked. Andrew flicked his sister's head.

"Listen, you're not going to believe what I just heard Mom and Orson talking about…"  
Danielle and Julie smirked and turned away, hiding their laughter.

"We've heard _plenty_ from them, Andrew!" Julie grinned. Andrew looked puzzled for a moment, before proceeding to tell them everything.

"Really? What part can't we believe about that?" Julie asked.

"Well…I dunno…but Orson has done something _really bad_."

"All of us have," Danielle sighed.  
"But, what if this has to do with the dead chick?"  
"It does," Julie cried. Danielle's eyes widened, "Orson killed her!"  
"That's stupid," Andrew snapped, "I think it's worse."  
Julie frowned, "Worse than killing Monique? Worse than framing Mike? Worse than yanking all her teeth out…" Julie gasped, "And he's a _dentist_, isn't he?"  
Danielle nodded, "Maybe I should have added _evil dentist _to that list at that sleepover,"

* * *

"Danielle?"  
Danielle groaned as a sing-song voice interrupted her and Julie's conversation.

"Danielle?" Bree grinned, poking her head round the door, "Could you take the trash out?"  
Danielle frowned, "But…but, I have company?"  
"I'm sure Julie won't mind," Bree said, "C'mon,"  
Danielle pulled a face, "_Please,_ Mom. Make Andrew do it,"  
Bree rolled her eyes, "I'll do it myself."  
Danielle grinned broadly as Bree left.  
"I wouldn't have minded," Julie said, "You could've done it."  
"_But I don't want to_!" Danielle grinned. She glanced at the clock.

"It's six thirty now," Danielle muttered, "Want to stay for dinner?"

"Sure," Julie said, "Beats Mom's soup-from-a-can. But I'll have to do home straight after dinner, 'kay?"  
Danielle nodded. Julie got up and gasped.

"Danielle! Why's there a ladder outside your window?"  
"Orson was cleaning the gutters. Why?"  
"Don't you remember that sleepover? That ladder has dangerous memories!"  
Danielle grinned, but then froze as she joined Julie at the window, "Why is there a little velvet bag tied to it?"  
"I don't know,"  
"Holy crap! Mom's climbing the ladder!"

"Why do you Van de Kamps _always climb the ladder_?"

* * *

Bree looked up the ladder, spotting the little bag. Just like the one Monique's teeth were in…interesting.  
Curiosity overcame her as she stepped onto the first rung and climbed cautiously towards the bag. Finally she came in reaching distance of it. Just one more rung. She put one foot on it and lifted the other one. And, suddenly, the rung snapped.

She screamed as she fell off the ladder and towards the hard concrete floor.

"Mom!" Danielle screeched, and she and Julie took off. They streamed past Orson and Andrew and ran outside towards Bree's fragile body lying on the floor.

"Mom!" Danielle cried, falling to her knees beside her. Julie picked up the little bag she was holding.

"Marbles?" Julie asked, "Does she collect…?"  
"No," Orson whispered. Andrew's face darkened, "What the hell is this then?"  
Orson moved away and called an ambulance on his cell phone.

"Andrew," Julie whispered, "Don't get any ideas…"  
"Too late," Andrew snarled, "Because now Mom's been hurt. And I'm sure her no-good husband is to blame!"  
"What then, Andrew? You going to go all _'it's personal' _on my ass?!" Julie snapped, doing a bad gangster impression.

"Look! Someone has an idea in their twisted minds that killing my mother is going to solve something."  
"A year ago, _you_ wanted to hurt her!" Julie snapped. She threw the marbles on the ground and went to sit with Danielle as ambulance sirens blared in the distance.

"Mom! Wake up!" Danielle pleaded. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a jelly-baby, "Maybe she needs one…"  
Julie grabbed it and threw it away, "Two things. One; she'd choke on it! Two; it's yucky and yellow."

"Oh,"  
A few moments later, and an ambulance drew up, and Julie and Danielle were pushed aside as they gathered Bree up. Orson and Andrew got into the ambulance with her, yelling out to the girls to watch the house.

"Like we get a choice," Danielle muttered as they drove down Wisteria Lane, arousing many curious neighbours.

Danielle and Julie sat at home alone for a long time. Andrew called them to say Bree was okay. And since then, they'd done nothing but watch cheesy _Godzilla_ type movies and eat ice-cream. Then the phone rang.

"Hi?" Danielle said, answering, "Yeah…uh-huh…_what_? Goodness gracious, Orson jumped off the roof? Dumbass…okay, bye,"  
Julie stared at Danielle, "Orson's dead?"  
"No, he's just stupid. He's okay. I'm sure he probably was just stupid enough to let Andrew too close to him. Ooh, _Night of the Killer Cows_ is on!"

Meanwhile, in another house on Wisteria Lane, Gloria Hodge (Orson's mommy) made a call to the hospital.

"Yes. I'm calling to check in on a patient…last name Hodge…what do you_ mean_ which Hodge?"  
And, after this phone call, Bree's devious mother in law came up with a plan. So evil…she told Alma (Orson's ex-wife who raped him).

"Suicide? Is he okay?" Alma cried.  
"Yes. But suicide isn't the act of a happily married man. But don't worry, Alma. Soon, Bree shall be gone, and he'll need a good woman like _you_ to consol him!"  
"What are you going to do to Bree? Gloria? _Gloria_?"  
Gloria merely walked away, leaving Alma in the locked attic.

* * *

When Bree had arrived home, she was greeted by her daughter, her daughter's best friend _(who was always around, didn't she have a mother to get home to?)_, and Andrew.

"Mom!" Danielle grinned, hugging her tightly.  
"Don't strangle me," Bree joked, but Danielle leapt back quickly as if she was worried this could happen.

Bree had to stay in bed for several hours, and Andrew had to leave for work at the Scavo's Pizzeria opening, and Julie left too. Leaving Danielle, alone, annoyed and out of jelly-babies.

"Danielle, are you okay?" Bree asked faintly. Danielle nodded solemnly, "Yeah,"

Bree didn't have time to grill her as the doorbell rang and Danielle took off to answer it.  
"Gloria?" she cried upon opening it.

"Hello dear. I heard about your mother's accident, and I bought some special homemade soup."  
A few minutes later, Danielle was putting the soup into a bowl, while Gloria watched over.

"So, why are you here and not at the Scavo's? A pretty thing like you should be at the party."  
"I would," Danielle sighed, "But Andrew had to go and someone needed to _baby-sit_ Mom."

"Oh. Well, sweetie, why don't you leave me to look after your mother, and you go?"  
Danielle grinned, "_Seriously_? Oh my God, thanks, Grandma!"  
Gloria hugged Danielle, "Anytime. Anyway, just take this soup up and score extra points by telling her _you_ made it,"  
Danielle nodded and took the tray and bowl upstairs.  
_Boy_, she thought, _It does smell good. I think I'll try it_.

Danielle took a tiny spoonful and tasted it.  
_Yummy_.

Danielle beamed and walked into her mother's room.

"Hi, Mom. I made you some soup."  
"Oh, sweetie, thank you!" Bree smiled, as Danielle put the plate on her lap.  
Danielle yawned, "Oh! I'm more tired than I thought. Anyway, enjoy!" Danielle started to leave the room, before looking at the window-seat.

_Hmm…_

Bree stared as her daughter yawned again, and sat on the window seat, before promptly falling asleep.

"Okay…" Bree whispered, before starting the soup herself.

* * *

Julie felt a tingle go up her spine. She looked at her mother, who was beaming down at her engagement ring from Ian, before quietly excusing herself and moving towards Andrew.  
"Andrew…"  
Andrew turned, "I just got a funny feeling about something."  
"Me too…and I reckon it's your sister…"  
Andrew nodded, "She is thick."

"Maybe I should go check on her?"  
"Thanks," Andrew said, and he turned back to his work, "Good luck,"  
Julie shrugged, and silently slipped out of the pizzeria.

* * *

"Dummy," Gloria muttered, upon seeing Danielle fast asleep on the window seat. She glanced over at Bree who was drifting off.

Bree's eyes widened slightly as Gloria perched on the bed, "Gloria…what are you doing here?"

"I came here to look after you."  
Bree tried to sit up, "Andrew? Danielle?"

"They're not here…well, Danielle is, but she passed out…"  
"So…sleepy…" Bree whispered, falling back.

"Then the pills in your soup are working."  
Bree's eyes slowly closed and her breathing steadied.

"I'm so sorry, Bree. I'm sorry that you got caught up in this. With Monique it was easy, she was a slut. But you are a good woman. But I can't let Orson become his father's son..."

* * *

"I want to go _home_!" Orson whined, as the nurse tried to get him to eat, "I need to speak with my wife!"  
"She was discharged hours ago, Mr. Hodge," the nurse smiled kindly, and she started to leave, "Oh! And your mother called…"  
"Ick…" Orson muttered, quietly.

"…she wanted to check you were staying overnight."

As she left, Orson's brain started ticking. Why would his _mother_ care?  
Then he started panicking.

When the nurse returned an hour later, Orson was _gone_…

* * *

Gloria lowered Bree slowly into the bath she had run. She lit the candles around the bathtub and smiled maliciously at the pictures of Bree and Orson.

As she walked downstairs into the kitchen, the phone starting ringing, but went quickly to the machine.

"_Bree? Bree, if you're there pick up! Pick up!_" Orson's worried voice rung around the kitchen, but Gloria ignored it and picked up the knife. Then she went back upstairs. And looked around Bree's bathroom.

Completely ready for Bree's 'suicide'.

* * *

Julie turned the doorknob and it opened easily. Julie frowned. Usually Bree kept doors locked, and so did Danielle. She shrugged and walked into the house.

"Danielle?" she called.

Gloria heard Julie's call and panicked. Another teenager to meddle in her plan.

She picked up her cane and left the knife next to Bree.

Julie was about to walk upstairs when she felt the faint aroma of old perfume.

"Is there an old lady in this house?" Julie cried. She looked around the living room and saw Gloria Hodge's purse.

"That can't be good…" Julie whispered. And she started to smell scented candles.

"Oh, crap…" Julie murmured. _Orson and Bree don't like Gloria. Gloria wants Orson back with Alma. Andrew thought it was Orson who caused Bree's accident, but what if it wasn't…_it was Gloria!!  
"Danielle!" Julie yelled, and started to run upstairs. But as she got to the top step, someone hit her in the face with a cane. Julie toppled downstairs and felt blood begin to seep out her nose. She rubbed her head where she'd cracked it on the banister and got up unsteadily.

"Ow…"

Julie grabbed a tissue from the box and held it against her nose and suddenly Orson crashed through the door.

"Julie!" Orson cried, seeing her holding a red tissue to her nose.  
"Orson!" Julie whispered, seeing his scars and bruises from falling off the roof.

Orson heard the bath running and they both took off upstairs. Orson burst into the bathroom while Julie ran over to wake Danielle up.

"Julie?" Danielle whispered, drowsily.

"Danielle, are you okay?"  
"Yeah. You look like hell though."

Julie nodded and helped her friend to her feet. Julie then heard several crashes in the bathroom and ran to check on Orson. He was trying to twist a knife from his mother's hand, whilst Bree slipped into the bathwater.

"Whoa." Danielle cried, staring at the bizarre sight in front of her.

"I know."  
Orson finally smacked the knife out of her hand, and pushed Gloria over. He then scooped Bree up in his arms and took her out of the bathroom.

Danielle and Julie stared at Gloria, who was muttering about having a stroke.

"I hope she _dies_!" Danielle hissed venomously.

"That's a bit cruel."  
"Oh."  
Danielle smiled at Julie, "Why do we keep having these odd adventures?"  
Julie shrugged, "It's fun though."  
Danielle nodded in agreement and they both started laughing.

* * *

_Hope you enjoyed. Please Review_


	12. Julie and Danielle's Big Surprise

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please?_

_Thanks to my sister who helped write this. This is the 12__th__ part and hopefully entertaining. This is kinda based on Danielle…that's a first…_

Julie and Danielle's Big Surprise 

Bree smiled at Andrew and Danielle as they came to give her a hug goodbye.  
"Bye, sweeties."  
"Bye, Mom."  
"Have fun, Mom,"  
Bree sighed as she and Orson set off towards the cab.

"I'll see you in a couple of days, dear." Bree said, sadly, "I'll miss you."  
"I'll miss you too, but soon we'll be off on our honeymoon…"  
"Leaving Danielle and Andrew the house for a couple of weeks…leaving Andrew to have a party…Danielle to invite _Julie_ over…them getting sugar rushes and running off…_I'm not going_!"  
Orson laughed and kissed Bree goodbye, "See you, honey."  
Bree climbed into the cab and glanced back worriedly as Mike Delfino walked up to talk to Orson, and her cab drove off

"A couple of weeks just you and me in this house?" grinned Danielle.

"Oh, yeah. This is going to be fun." Andrew said, putting an arm around his sister.

Andrew was regretting his words the next morning, as he repeatedly hit the bathroom door with his fist.

"You're still in there? How long does it take to pluck that unibrow?" he yelled

"Leave me alone!" Danielle snapped through the door.

"Danielle, I have to be at work in ten minutes. Now can I please just come in and brush my teeth?"

"I'm having a really bad day, all right? Just go away!"

"I'm gonna have a really bad day, too. I tend not to get tipped when my breath stinks." Andrew cried, and he hit the door again.  
Danielle swung the door open, face tearstained and mascara running down her face, and held up a white stick, "I'm pregnant."  
Andrew gaped as Danielle slammed the door shut.

"Um…okay…" he called, "I'll brush my teeth later."  
As he walked downstairs, he grabbed a phone and dialed a number.

"Hello? Mr. Fisher's Candy Store? My sister's having a bad day. Could you drop by some bags of jelly-babies?…Your whole stock. Thanks."

When Danielle finally came down stairs, she thought she'd died and gone to heaven. In her living room, there were boxes upon boxes upon bags of…

"Jelly-babies!"

Andrew grinned, "This cost a bomb, but cos you're pregnant, I was nice and stole Orson's credit card."

Danielle grinned and hugged Andrew, "Thank you, Andrew! This is so _sweet_! What about work?"

"If anyone asks, I fell down the stairs and broke a rib!" Andrew smiled proudly.

"Now, I have to tell Austin. And Julie!" Danielle's face fell, "Tell my best friend that I'm having the baby of her first love ever, the man she gave her virginity to. I mean, she was mad about me being the other woman, I don't know how…"

Danielle bit her nails and stared around the room, "We're gonna need more jelly-babies…"

Andrew groaned, "We're gonna need a bigger _house, _at this rate!"

_Knock-Knock_!

Andrew and Danielle both jumped as Julie let herself in.

"Hey, guys, I saw Bree leave and Orson talking to Mike, so I…"

Julie stared dumb-struck at the jelly-babies.

"By the power of Grey Skull…" she whispered in awe, "What's with all the _jelly-babies_! You could get a _huge_ sugar rush with these!"

Danielle nodded, "Erm…we…_Andrew broke a rib_!"  
Andrew hurriedly fell back onto the sofa, "_Ow_! It hurts! _Nurse_! _Nurse_!"  
Julie frowned, "He was standing up a minute ago…"  
Andrew frowned, "I was. I said that to get out of working!"  
Andrew beamed and stood back up. Julie still looked confused, "Er…"  
Danielle said, "What's up, Jules?"  
Julie pulled out a piece of paper, "Austin gave me this. It's a note, apologizing! It's so _sweet_! I'm kinda ashamed to admit, that, um, I cried. I want to take him back."  
"_No!_" Danielle cried, making everyone jump.

"Eh?"  
"Erm…no, don't. He'll hurt you, sweetie." Danielle pouted, hugging Julie.  
"How? Cheating again?"  
"Yes! Exactly that!…sort of…"

Julie sighed, "Let me sleep on it…"  
"Yes! _Sleep_!" Danielle yawned, "I could use some…"  
Julie frowned again, and, bidding the Van de Kamp kids goodbye, she left.

"Now what?" Danielle snapped, "I gotta tell Austin. Oh, Lord…"

* * *

Danielle jumped as Austin hit the table.

"Are you sure?" he demanded.

"Yes. I peed on five different sticks. Would you put that burrito away? It's making me nauseous."

"Join the club." Austin snapped, putting his burrito down, "Look, I-I know your parents are religious, but I know this clinic…"

"Absolutely not!" Danielle shrieked.

"So what other choice do we have?"

"Well, gee, you could, like, uh, _marry_ me?"

"Marry you?! I can't stand you." Austin cried.

"Oh, nice way to talk to the mother of your child!" Danielle hissed, trying not to look offended, then she clutched her stomach, "Oh, God. Bathroom."

Danielle ran into the bathroom, seconds before Julie entered the open door.

"Hey." she grinned. Austin jumped.

"Julie. Hi. Uh, hey."

"Your door was open. Can I come in?"

"Uh, wh-what are you doing here?" Austin stammered.

"I read your letter. I had no idea it would be so sweet. I could really tell it came from your heart. I'm embarrassed to admit, I...cried."

Both jumped as they heard retching from the bathroom.

Austin lied, "Uh, my Aunt Edie sort of tied one on last night."

"Oh. Anyway, I-I guess what I'm saying is...Okay." Julie told him.

"Okay? Uh…"

"We can try again." Julie grinned.

"Julie, that's great! And I want to talk about this, uh, but I just kinda need to take care of my aunt. Can I call you tomorrow?"

"Sure. Oh, we're gonna have to take things slow, 'cause it'll be a while before I can trust you again."

"I understand."

Julie left the house, waving at him, as Austin silently groaned. Danielle came out, looking pale.

"That was awful. Hey, what's with you?"  
Austin turned to face her, "Julie's gonna give me another shot."  
Danielle's face fell, "_What_? Even when you told her I was pregnant?"  
Austin frowned, "I-I didn't…"  
"Austin!" she cried, "You can't…Aaugh!"  
Danielle stalked towards the door.

"Where're you going?"  
"I'm going to get some jelly-babies, and then we can talk about this like rational people!"  
"There's nothing to talk about!" Austin cried, "We don't love each other. I'm going to take Julie back, and we are going to get rid of this brat and _you_ are going to stay out of my life!"  
Danielle's eyes were widened in shock and hurt, and she mumbled, "F-fine. I'll stay out of your life. Goodbye."  
Danielle solemnly left the house, and Austin was about to call her back, when he saw her start running back down the street.

* * *

Julie skipped into her room and grabbed her phone, about to call Danielle.

"I hope she's not hurt…" she muttered to herself, as the phone was ringing.

Andrew picked up, "Hello?"  
"Hi, Andrew," Julie said, "Is Danielle there?"  
"No, she's not back from Austin's yet."  
Julie froze, "W-w-w-what?"  
"Yeah…" Andrew cursed silently, and invented a lie, "She went there to…erm…say, if, er…you two got back together she would _definatly _not be the other woman, no matter how much he pleaded…if he…pleaded…"  
"Aw!" Julie cried, "That's so _sweet_! Aw, man. Okay, tell her I called, please?"

"Sure," Andrew said, "Bye, Julie."  
"Bye."  
Andrew hung up the phone, breathing a sigh of relief, when Danielle marched in with an armful of jelly-babies.

"Hey,"  
Danielle scowled, her face like thunder, "_You_…"  
Andrew frowned as Danielle laid into him.  
"You and your _disgusting_ race! God, I will _kill_ myself if any child I may bear is a _boy_ like you and that _stupid Austin Britt_!"

Andrew shrank back, "We're sorry. We didn't know what we were thinking?"  
Danielle sat down, and started picking yellow jelly-babies out of her packets.

"So…didn't go so well, huh?"  
"No!" Danielle cried, tears springing to her eyes, "H-h-he told me to get rid of this baby, and stay out of his life… while he got back together with _Julie_…"  
Andrew put his arm around Danielle, which stopped her hands scurrying through the packets, "Want me to talk to him?"  
Danielle shook her head, "We've got to talk to Orson, and Mom."  
Andrew pulled a face, "Oh, Lord, have mercy on me!"

"_You_?"  
"Hey, I'm the big brother, and I have set an _awful _example for you, my poor knocked-up sister!"

A few minutes later, they sat on the living room sofa, when Orson came in, and double checked his luggage.

"All right. I'm off to join your mother. The hotel number's on the fridge in case there's a problem. Bree said her cell phone isn't getting good reception." Orson told them.

"Uh, actually, we...we kinda already have a problem." Andrew muttered, standing up.

"Well, I'm already late for my flight. Can this wait a few weeks till we're back?" Orson asked, pleadingly.

"Yeah, this could wait a few weeks." Andrew said, innocently.

"Oh, good."

"I mean, heck, this particular problem could wait...nine months." Andrew beamed. Orson took one look at Danielle's guilty face, and groaned.

"Good Lord."

Andrew nodded, "You're going to be a _step-grandfather_!"  
Andrew put his arm around Orson's shoulder, and grinned at him. Orson groaned again, "I'll call your mother."  
"It was nice knowing me," Danielle muttered, lying back on the sofa.

Orson grabbed the phone, and dialed the hotel number, scowling at Danielle.  
"Hello. Can you connect me to Bree Hodge? Room 666. Thanks…hello, darling. It's Orson…hi. I have some bad news…no, the kitchen is fine….so is the bedroom…and the house, look honey…no, _the garden is fine_! Honey, Danielle has a problem…uh-huh…she's pregnant…"  
Danielle and Andrew jumped as Bree's loud, angry voice screeched through the phone, "_**What**_?!"  
Andrew smirked as Orson kept pulling the phone from his ear and putting it back, trying to calm Bree down.

"No…Bree --" **-pulls away-**"…honey, stop yelling…" **-pulls away-**"…Bree! No…no…stop…Bree, don't use that word!" **-pulls away-** "…It's not my fault! Blame…blame…"  
Orson covered the mouth piece and looked at Danielle, "Who…?"  
"Austin Britt."  
"Oh."

Orson put the phone to his ear again and said, "_Blame Austin Britt_!…no…wait, I shall not _do that_! He is too young! No, I am not going to turn his face that colour…" **-pulls away-**"…sweetie!…pumpkin!…_shush_!….okay, I'm sorry! Calm down!"  
Orson walked upstairs with the phone, and Danielle and Andrew could faintly hear their argument.

"You want me to chop off the thing that made her preg-- _No!_" Orson yelled.

Andrew was pink from laughter, while Danielle was white and frightened.

* * *

Austin sat on the sofa, uncomfortably, while Andrew and Danielle sat on chairs in front of him, and Orson stood over him, .

"All right. Here's what we're thinking. Clearly, the idea of the two of you getting married is ridiculous." Orson smiled.

"So what do you want me to do?" Austin nodded.

"Glad you asked." Orson said, "Bree and I have decided that Danielle will join us on our honeymoon. When we return, we'll tell our friends she's decided to study abroad. Once the baby is born and adopted by a suitable family, she'll come home."

"What about me?" Austin asked.

"You leave." Orson answered.

"Leave?!" Austin cried.

"Get out of Fairview and don't tell a soul why, not even your aunt."

"I can't do that."

Orson narrowed his eyes, "Why not?"

"Because I've got responsibilities here. People are counting on me."

"Yeah, well, you should have thought of that before you impregnated my stepdaughter."

"I said I'm not leaving!"

Andrew stood up, "Oh, easy there, turbo. Uh...we'll be right back."

Andrew led Austin into the kitchen.

"So who exactly is counting on you? Hmm? Julie Mayer, maybe?" Andrew asked, gleefully.

"She gave me another chance. I can't leave if I've still got a shot with her."

"And what's gonna happen when Julie finds out you knocked up my sister?"

"Didn't your step-dad just say no one's gonna find out about that?" Austin hissed.

"Okay. Try this. Julie's a nice girl, and you, well...you're a dog. No knock. I'm a dog lover myself, but Julie deserves better. You know you'll just end up cheating on her." Andrew said, eyeing him up.

"No, I won't hurt her again." Austin muttered, turning away.

"Sure you will. Not right away. Maybe you'll hold out for six months, but then it'll hurt her even more. Am I wrong? You just have to ask yourself if you can be the kind of guy she needs you to be. If you can't...walk away."  
Andrew left the kitchen. Austin closed his eyes and hung his head, sadly, knowing Andrew was right.

* * *

Julie walked out of the house into the crisp night air toward her car when she saw Austin on the driveway.

"Hey." he greeted.

"Hey. How's it going?" she smiled.

"Good. Good, uh...just wanted to tell you, I have to leave town for a while." Austin murmured.

"Really? Is something wrong?"

"No, no, no. It's just family stuff. I don't know exactly when I'll be back. It could be a while, though."

"Oh. Okay." Julie sighed, sadly.

"I just want you to know that...it means a lot that you were willing to give me a second chance. You're, like, the only person that's ever done that." Austin told her.

"Austin…" Julie paused, "What's going on?"

"Nothing, uh, it's just...I have to go. Good-bye, Julie."

Austin began to walk away, but Julie called him back.

"Austin!"

He turned around, and Julie ran up and kissed him. He reluctantly pulled away and whispered, "I gotta go."  
Julie nodded and watched him leave, feeling her heart grow heavy. Very heavy indeed.

_Hope you enjoyed. Please R__eview._


	13. Just Danielle's Adventure at the Nunnery

_

* * *

Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please? This part is fairly random, and it has Danielle__'__s first few months at the nunnery. This is the 13__th__ part and hopefully entertaining. Only Danielle. Kinda bad._

Just Danielle's Adventure at the Nunnery

"You're leaving me…_here_?" Danielle squawked, staring at the large stone building, with no wires, or satellites or…_anything_ resembling the modern world.

"Mom! No!" she whined.

"Danielle," Bree said sternly, "You got yourself into this mess, and _we__'__re _getting you out."  
Danielle frowned, "Send me to _Paris_! _Rome_! _New York_! Whatever, just _not here_!"  
Orson leaned into his wife, and whispered something Danielle wasn't _supposed _to hear.

"_No jelly-babies_!" she shrieked, "_Liars! Traitors_! It can't be true! Mommy?"  
Bree nodded, "It's true."  
Danielle's sad face turned into one of twisted fury, "This is no nunnery! It's _jelly-baby rehab_!"

"Honey!" Bree smiled, "It's like killing two birds with one stone!"  
"What bird? What stone? Why are you torturing them?" Danielle cried. Orson rolled his eyes.

"So, you little lovebirds get to go _skiing_ in _Europe_ while I'm stuck in _some stupid-stone-no electricity-pretending-to-be-a-nunnery-jelly-baby-rehab _hell!" Danielle yelled, gesturing wildly at the nunnery. Nuns strolling around the grounds attempted not to look offended.

Orson bit his lip and attempted to change the subject, "When shall we meet possibilities for Danielle's adoptive family?"  
"_Now you__'__re getting rid of me?_" Danielle wailed.

"I mean for your baby!"

"Oh. Much better."  
Bree sighed, "We've met them."  
"We have? Who?"  
Bree smiled, "I'm pregnant!"  
Orson's mouth fell open, "What?"  
Danielle rolled her eyes, "You can stay here with me, if you really want to, Mom! We'll both meet people after our babies…ooh! A mother-daughter activity! Giving up our children! And we can _fight_ against the jelly-baby hating nuns!"

Bree frowned and shook her head at her.  
Orson took Bree's hand, "We're having a baby?"  
"Urm…" Bree shrugged, "No…sorta…-ish…Danielle's."  
"_What_?" Danielle and Orson cried.

"I'm going to be pregnant. Or _pretending _to be. Padding. Then, when the baby's born, it'll be ours. Or so people will think. And the baby will never know I'm it's grandmother…" Bree grimaced, "…and it's sister is it's mother…"

Danielle laughed, "This kid'll be more twisted then me."

Bree scowled at her, then beamed at Orson, "We're adopting it as our _own_."  
"Oh," Orson frowned, "Do you think it's right?"  
Bree's face fell again, "Orson, _none_ of this is right!! My seventeen year old daughter is pregnant! This is not how I planned it _at all_! It's what we're going to do no matter how much you complain, or how little I'm going to want to do it…or how fat people will think I am…it's for the good of Danielle's child. It'll be with its family. No matter how twisted it is."  
Bree sighed, trying to hold back tears, and beamed again, "Now. We're going to forget this matter and enjoy our honeymoon. Danielle…"  
Bree hugged her daughter, "Have fun, Danielle. We'll be down to see you."  
As Bree tried to pull away, Danielle hung on, "_Don__'__t leave me here, momma_!"

Bree hugged her back, remembering when she left Andrew by the side of the road and he'd said almost the same things, "I'll be back soon, sweetie. Try to look after yourself."  
Bree finally detached herself and climbed into the car with Orson, breathing deeply to stop herself from crying. Orson drove off, leaving Danielle with her suitcase.

The Head nun, Sister Elizabeth, approached her.

"Danielle Van de Kamp," she said sharply, "Do follow me."  
Danielle's eyes widened, "_Whoa_! Were you in _The Sound of Music_?"  
"Pardon?"  
"You look like you were in _The Sound of Music_! Quick, sing!"  
"What?"  
"Sing!"  
"No!"  
"Sing! Please!"  
"Fine!! _The hills are alive, with the sound of mus--…_"_  
_"Nope. Not you. C'mon then, where's my room, sister?"  
Danielle beamed and headed for the front door. Sister Elizabeth frowned and looked at the girl's suitcase.

"Oh!" Danielle called back, "Do bring my suitcase. I'm a pregnant woman and you don't want to hurt one of God's creatures…_do you_?"  
Sister Elizabeth nodded and picked up the suitcase, "As you wish."

* * *

The next morning, Danielle was sleeping when suddenly she heard singing. She glanced at her clock.

"Six in the morning!" she moaned, sitting up. Sister Elizabeth rapped on her door and called, "Breakfast, Danielle."  
"It's _six in the morning_!"  
"Yes. You slept in."  
"_You what_?"  
"Our mass was at five thirty, and has just finished, and now the sisters are eating. Come."  
Danielle sat up, in her teddy pajamas and curlers in her hair, and she slipped her feet into puppy slippers. She put her hand on her stomach and murmured, "Morning, roomie."  
"_You have a roommate?_"  
"No, sister…just saying good morning to the baby that…" Danielle faltered, "I'm…giving…up…"

Sister Elizabeth walked in and looked at Danielle's guilty face, "Danielle…"  
Danielle suddenly spluttered and ran for the bathroom. Sister Elizabeth sighed and stood by the door as Danielle threw up.

Danielle finished puking and sat by the toilet, wiping her mouth. She could hear the sister pacing by the door and called, "If I had a child, I was going to name a boy Rex, after my father. I was going to call a girl Scarlett."

"Those are nice names," the sister called, starting to like the girl…

"Or Jelly! Baby as a middle name!"  
…or not…

"The first names are nicer, Danielle."  
Danielle came out and shrugged, "I'm giving it up anyway. I don't get to name it. Mom does…and she'll name it _Mary_ or _Magdalene _or _Paul_ or…or something."  
The sister smiled, "You seem jealous that your mother gets it."

"No! This thing is an _accident_!"  
"God never has _accidents_ on this world."

Danielle shrugged, "God has _failed _me. He killed my dad, made all the men I've loved not love me back or disappear, made my mother obsessive-compulsive and a control-freak, and got me knocked up with my best friend's boyfriend."  
"Maybe it's because of all these sins he's punishing you."  
Danielle gasped, "_Sins_? What did I do?"  
"Well, you slept with your best friend's boyfriend. He made you pregnant from that to teach you a lesson," Sister Elizabeth said, "Perhaps you deserved this."  
"Are you saying I'm a _slut_?"

"Well…I wouldn't use that word…"

"Oh!" Danielle snarled, completely overreacting, "Some nun _you _are! _It__'__s on_!"

* * *

From that moment on, Danielle and Sister Elizabeth were locking horns almost everyday, much to the chagrin of everyone else. When Danielle slept late, she went hungry. When Danielle ever spoke back to her, Sister Elizabeth made her kiss the floor twice.

"Yuk!" Danielle cried, sitting up from her latest floor-kissing episode, "Tastes like…like _feet_!"  
Sister Elizabeth sighed, "I made a mistake enraging a hormonal pregnant teenager. Even if I did it by accident!"  
"Yes! You did," Danielle snapped, resting her hands on her slightly swollen stomach. "Good day."  
Danielle walked away, wondering why her mother hadn't visited in two months. She was four months pregnant, and was getting _fat! _Danielle walked away, and she marched out of the corridor into the hall…where Bree and Orson stood, chatting to a nun.

Danielle gasped, "_Mom!_"  
Bree turned to her and beamed at her, "_Danielle_!"

Danielle ran across the hall, dodging nuns and pillars, straight into her mother's comforting arms.

"Mommy, mommy, mommy…" Danielle whispered, breathing in her mother's scent of fresh-baked cookies and perfume.

"Oh sweetie," Bree grinned, stepping back, "Look at you. You're…bigger."  
Danielle nodded, smiling, but then frowned, "Where have you _been_ for the last two months!"  
Bree and Orson glanced at each other as Danielle ranted on, "Not only have I been getting fatter, going through morning sickness and swollen ankles, I've been locked in arguments with Sister Stick-up-her-Butt every day, my pajamas are too small so I have to wear in _your sort of nightdress_ and _I__'__ve gone cold-turkey on jelly-babies_!"  
Orson handed her a packet of jelly-babies, "I got you something."  
Danielle took them, eyes wide and glittering. Bree looked surprised, "Orson. When did you get those?"  
"I thought she needed a treat, so I got them yesterday."  
Danielle burst into tears, and hugged Orson, "_Thank you so much, Orson_!"  
Orson patted her back, "It's…okay, Danielle."

Danielle wiped her eyes, "Thanks. So, what kept you?"  
"Well, we never found the time," Bree explained.

"What were you doing?"  
Bree and Orson shifted, uncomfortably, "Erm…skiing…and whatnot…"  
"And by skiing, you mean having se--"  
"_Skiing as well_!" Bree cried. Danielle smiled, "I'm just so happy to see you. Now you're here, I don't have to kiss any floors."  
Bree and Orson frowned, but followed Danielle out into the grounds for a walk.

"So, do you like Sister Elizabeth?" Bree asked.

Danielle, who had crammed the jelly-babies into her mouth, shrugged, "'he's 'o'y."  
"What?"  
Danielle swallowed, "She's okay."

Orson saw a nun heading for them, "Is that her?"  
"Yes." Danielle groaned as she approached.

"Hello, Mr and Mrs Hodge." Sister Elizabeth smiled, shaking their hands, "Good to see you."  
"Hello, Sister Elizabeth," Bree said, "I do hope Danielle hasn't been particularly bothersome to you."  
"Oi…"  
"No, she is a good girl. A worthy opponent," Sister Elizabeth joked.  
Danielle coughed, "Sister, did you eat garlic for lunch?"  
Bree nearly choked from the _rudeness, _but the Sister nodded, "Lasagna and garlic bread. Oh, sorry dear. Go."  
Bree and Orson looked confused as Danielle covered her mouth and ran off.

"Garlic makes her nauseous." the Sister grinned.

"Oh," Orson muttered.

The Sister smiled, "So, you are going to adopt the child?"  
"Yes," Bree sighed.

"Can I ask you something on Danielle's behalf?"  
"Sure," Bree said, "What is it?"  
"Don't name it Scarlett or Rex,"

Bree visibly stiffened, while Orson looked confused, "Why?"  
The Sister smiled, "She's saving them for her own. Good day,"  
Sister Elizabeth moved away, while Bree looked at Orson.

"You…don't think she wants to…_keep_ the baby?" Bree whispered.

"I don't," Danielle scoffed, appearing behind them, "Why would I?"  
"Sister Elizabeth told us not to name it Scarlett or Rex."  
Danielle shrugged, "I like those names."

Bree patted her shoulder, "It's good to think about that now. Anyway, we should be off now, sweetheart."

Danielle hugged Bree and Orson goodbye and watched them leave, both Danielle and Bree welling up again. As they drove away, Danielle found herself silently cradling her bump. _Did _she want to keep it?

* * *

_Okay, lame ending much. Hope you enjoyed. Please Review._


	14. Julie and Danielle and Secrets

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do._

_This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please? This is the 14__th__ part and hopefully entertaining. _

Julie and Danielle When Secrets are Revealed 

_When Gabrielle Solis agreed to marry Victor Lang, she was determined to have a very traditional wedding. She was even more determined to be a very traditional bride. To that end, the handkerchief in her cleavage was borrowed, the garter on her leg was blue, and the diamonds on her ears were old. But sadly for Gabrielle, something was missing, and she was about to throw a traditional fit._

"It is after three o'clock! Where the hell is Bree with my something new?" Gabrielle cried.

"I know her plane landed on time. She'll probably be here any second." Susan tried to calm her friend down.

"God, I should have my head examined for even agreeing to this. Who the hell cares about Swiss jewellery anyway?"

"Gaby, Bree went out of her way to buy you that bracelet." Lynette said.

"And, of course, it's the hottest day of the year. All the guests are out there sweating like pigs. God, at this rate, my reception's gonna look like the finish line of the Boston marathon."

"If you're that freaked out, just get married without the bracelet." Lynette muttered.

"Are you out of your mind? I can't get married without my something new."

"Oh, I have an idea. I just got a lipstick yesterday. You could wear that." Susan grinned, pulling a lipstick out of her purse.

"I just paid a makeup artist five hundred bucks to do my face. Do you really think I wanna march down the aisle looking like I just ate a popsicle?" Gabrielle snapped.

"Okay, it's your big day, so I'm gonna let that slide." Susan murmured, putting the lipstick down.

"God, it is ten after, and Bree is never late! Where can she be? All right, that's it. After I finish _'tszujing'_ my hair, tell the preacher it's showtime. I can't believe my wedding's already ruined, and it hasn't even started."

Gabrielle stormed out of the room, kicking a present violently.

"Hey, I'm starting to get worried about Bree. Maybe we should call." Lynette suggested, staring after Gabrielle as she slammed the door to her dressing room.

"Yeah. I'm calling her cell. It's ringing." Susan said.

"Oh, good."

Susan and Lynette glanced at each other, surprised, as they heard a ringing in the room. They turned slowly and saw Bree, smiling at them.

"Bree!" Susan cried.

"Oh, wow!" Lynette gushed.

"Hello, ladies." Bree beamed.

"Is that Bree? She better not have come empty-handed!" Gabrielle yelled from behind the door.

"Oh, I didn't." Bree called back.

Gabrielle stormed back in and froze, staring.

_As promised, Bree had arrived with something new._

"Holy crap!" Gabrielle gasped.

_And she also..._

Bree giggled as she held the bracelet over her pregnant stomach. Exactly the effect she was expecting.

…_brought the bracelet.

* * *

_

**-Earlier-**

Julie was washing dishes in the kitchen. As she finished, she pulled off her yellow gloves and again tried to call Danielle. No answer. She growled in frustration and suddenly something outside caught her eye. A taxi outside of the Hodge house, with two familiar people greeting Andrew.

"Yes!" she grinned, running out of the kitchen, across the street. Bree and Orson turned and smiled at her.

"Well, hello there, Julie." Bree said.

"You guys are back!" Julie grinned.

Bree glanced at her hair, "Wow, somebody's...blonder."

Julie reached up to her head, which she had dyed since they'd left, "Oh, yeah, my mom hates it, too. So where's Danielle?"

Bree shifted, which Julie noticed, and then Bree said, "Well, um, while we were in Switzerland, she ran across this boarding school, and she fell in love with it and just insisted that we let her spend a year abroad."

Julie smiled, suspicions aroused, "Wow. She must be having a really good time. She hasn't returned any of my phone calls."

"Oh, well, um, you know, her school's up in the mountains, and--and her cell phone reception is kind of funky." Andrew muttered. Julie wondered why he hadn't told her this earlier. Or that Mrs. Hodge was _pregnant_!

"She hasn't answered my e-mails, either." Julie told them. Bree's face fell.

"Well, I am gonna call her tonight and have a little talk with her about common courtesy, and I'm sure that you will get an e-mail first thing tomorrow morning. Well, we should go. I've got to get that bracelet to Gaby before the wedding." she grinned.

"Well, I'll see you guys there. Bye." Julie said.

As she turned around, she froze for a second, before turning back.

"Before you go, Mrs. Hodge…" Julie started, "Since when are you_ pregnant_?"  
The Hodges all glanced at each other before Andrew cried, "Well, I assumed you _knew _this, but since you don't, when a mommy loves a daddy _very _much, they--"  
"Okay!" snapped Julie, "But, I mean…why didn't Andrew tell me? I asked him once why Danielle wasn't answering and he just shrugged it off."  
Andrew had the face on that said '_Tattletale_' but Bree just waved it off, "Well, we didn't tell him about Danielle until a little while ago, and I don't know why he didn't tell you about our little bundle of joy."  
Julie nodded, "Uh-huh…anyway, congrats! Bye,"  
Julie waved and left for good this time. Bree and Orson sighed in relief, and glanced at Andrew.

Julie walked back into her house, shrugging off her suspicions. Her phone rang, and she picked it up and gasped. _Danielle_, it said on the screen. She answered it and cautiously said, "Hello?"  
"_Help me_, _Julie Mayer_!" someone wailed.

"What?" Julie cried, "Who are you?"  
Danielle sat on her bed, phone pressed to her ear, "It's me, Danielle! I'm stuck in the _suckyest suckfest _ever!"  
"But your mom…"  
"My mother _lies_! I'm not at a _boarding school_ or whatever! I'm in _America_! I'm only three hours away from Fairview, for God's sake!"  
A nun knocked on the door and stuck her head around, "Don't use the Lord's name in vain, Danielle!"  
Danielle looked at her, "Sorry, Sister Greta."  
Sister Greta closed the door again, and Danielle went back to her phone conversation,

"Seriously, Julie! Suckyest _suckfest_!"

Julie frowned, "Are you at a nunnery?"  
"Yes!"  
"Why? I knew your mom was religious but this is--"  
"Julie! Let me explain! But, first you must _pick me up_!"  
"No."  
"Okay, fine. The story is…me and Austin are having a baby."

"_What_?" Julie bellowed.

"Look, I got pregnant and Mom and Orson dropped me off at this nunnery and she's faking pregnancy to adopt it as her own."  
"Whoa. Seriously, Danielle, therapy!"  
"I'm thinking of that."

"It can't be that bad, Danielle! Nuns are _nice_ people!"  
"_No jelly-babies_!"  
Julie gasped, "My poor friend! Okay, listen, Mrs. Solis is getting married soon, so I can't come. But, let me confront your mom."  
"What? You can't! You don't know what she's _capable_ of! I don't want you to die, I still like you!"  
Julie rolled her eyes, "Call me back, okay? Later?"  
"No. You. Pick. Me. Up. Or. _Die_."  
Julie muttered a goodbye and hung up as Danielle started complained. She went into her mother's study and went into a drawer where her mother kept congratulatory cards in case of an emergency…like she forgot a birthday.

She quickly scribbled a message in it, put it in an envelope, and ran across the street. Orson answered in a gray tux.

"Julie?" he said.

"Hey, Mr. Hodge. Mind if I come in? I didn't think so." Julie gabbled, ducking under his arm. He closed the door as Bree came down in a pink dress.

"Julie?" Bree smiled, hands on her 'pregnant' belly, "What a surprise."  
Julie held out a card, "I just got you this card. For the baby."  
Bree went slightly pink, "Oh. Yes, thanks."  
"No problem." Julie smiled, narrowing her eyes, "So. You must be, like, five months along. It must be kicking now, right?"  
Bree nodded, "Erm…sure…it's kicking up a storm right now…heh heh,"  
"Oh, can I feel?" Julie asked, faking enthusiasm as she moved forward slightly. Bree took a small step back, "Erm, actually it's s-s-stopped."  
"Oh," Julie pouted, "Now, I'll have to go see Danielle at the _nunnery_ to feel a baby kick,"  
Bree's face went pale as Orson gasped, "What?"  
"Danielle called." Julie muttered, "She's really not happy."

"She's not at a nunnery." Orson laughed.

"Please!" Julie snorted, "No offence, or anything, but she called me. She asked me to pick her up."  
"Oh, _damn_ that girl!" Bree cried, "She'll do anything for jelly-babies."  
"Julie," Orson put his hands on Julie's shoulders and spun her to face him, "You have to promise not to tell _anyone_!"  
Julie looked confused for a second before saying, "Is this another one of those keeping up appearances thing like when Bree told people Andrew went to theatre camp when she actually dumped him at the side of the road?"  
"_Does Danielle have any secrets_?" Bree snapped, shrilly.  
"Julie," Orson pleaded, "You've got to keep this under your hat."  
"I wear _no _hats that make my friend miserable!" Julie cried, "I don't like hat hair! Besides, why don't you hide her here?"  
"Too big a risk." Andrew said, appearing as if from nowhere. Julie stared at him, "Where did…?"

"Look, Julie…" Orson sighed, "Please?"  
"Fine." Julie lied.

"She's _lying_!" Andrew snarled. He could tell by the twitch of her fingers. Julie gave him her own _Tattletale_ look. Orson raised an eyebrow, "Julie."  
"I'm going to pick Danielle up!" Julie cried, "I'll keep whatever secret. But she's staying with me."  
"How can you…?" Andrew started.

"I've hidden a boy in my room. I can hide a pregnant girl." Julie snorted, before biting her tongue.

"Ow."  
"Julie, you _cannot_!" Orson said. Julie was about to argue when her phone rang.

"What?" she snapped into the phone.

"Julie?" she heard a tearful voice say.

"Danielle?" Julie asked, before moving out of the way of Bree, who lunged for the phone, "What's wrong?"  
"Is Mom there?"  
"Yeah. I just talked to her."  
"Look, Julie, her plan isn't going to work."  
"Why?"  
The Hodge family stared as Julie's curious face fell into one of shock.

"You what?"

_T.B.C…

* * *

_

_Ooh! My first cliff hanger! Hope you enjoyed. Please R__eview! By the way, I _know _Julie was very blunt in this chapter, but still!_


	15. Julie and Danielle: Best Friends Forever

_Disclaimer: I own a car. A house. A flying saucer. Yet I do not own Desperate Housewives. Marc Cherry does. Lucky Guy. Ever had days when you wish you were Marc? I do. Apologies to Avril Lavigne! …and fans. Thanks to my sis…you _rock_, girl!! This is following the same basic events in series 3 but slightly changed__…__okay, a lot. Almost completely, get off my back__…__please? This is the 15__th__ part and hopefully entertaining…**and the last chapter**… I can hear the cheers, people! Be quieter!_

Julie and Danielle: Best Friends Forever

Julie hung up her phone, and could feel tears pricking at her eyes though she didn't know why.  
"Julie?" Bree whispered, "What?"  
Julie suddenly did something weird. She pretended she was a Van de Kamp. She put on a fake smile and turned to the Hodges.

"I've, erm, I've got to…to go,"  
Julie walked towards the door, smiling cheerfully.  
"Is Danielle okay?"  
"Yes." Julie cried, "Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, is the word 'fine' starting to sound weird? Okay, see you!"  
Julie headed off across the street, to where her car was parked. She got in and started the engines. She was looking for a nunnery three hours outside of Fairview. Couldn't be that hard! Julie drove off of Wisteria Lane, leaving the curious eyes of the Hodges behind. She still bit her tears back and she turned on her radio and put it on the first station.

'_Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I don't like your girlfriend!  
No way! No way!  
I think you need a new one  
Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I could be your girlfriend _

Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I know that you like me  
No way! No way!  
You know it's not a secret  
Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I want to be your girlfriend--' 

Julie slammed off the radio and shuddered, "Ruining the _moment_, Avril!"

She quickly found a different station and listened to country western music all the way there.

Julie drove up to the nunnery and stared at it. This was the only one within a hundred miles. It had to be here. Stone building. No electricity signs.

"Bree Hodge is crueller than I thought!" she decided. She got out and saw several nuns discussing something. She smiled and walked up to them.  
"Excuse me," she interrupted, "I'm looking for Danielle Van de Kamp."  
The nuns turned, and one said, "Hello. I am Sister Elizabeth. Who might you be?"  
"I am…" Julie bit her lip, "…Julie Van de Kamp. Her sister."  
"Oh," Sister Elizabeth smiled, and then her face fell, "Did Mrs. Hodge send you?"  
Julie shrugged, "Sure -- I mean, yeah. Yep, she had to go to a wedding, and said I should go as we are, just, so so close!"  
Sister Elizabeth smiled sympathetically, "I shall show you to the hospital wing."  
Julie started following the Sister through the nunnery, as she talked, "Such an unfortunate accident. She was fighting with Sister Anne, screaming she wanted to go home. Then, she stormed off. Never saw the stairs, and she fell down them. It was horrible. We called in the doctor as soon as we could and hopefully he saved that child's life. I know that she called someone during very painful contractions to tell them..."  
"Me," Julie muttered.  
"You?"  
"Like I said," Julie stammered, "Close, close, close."  
The sister nodded and led her towards a white door, "She's in here. The doctor may be with her, helping, but I'm not sure. Go on in. It's time for mass."  
As the Sister walked away, she whispered to Julie, "We'll pray for your sister's child, Julie. That baby is one of the Lord's creations and He wouldn't fail it."  
Julie was about to push the door open, preparing herself for a gruesome sight, and found herself repeating their phone conversation in her mind.

* * *

"_What?__"__ she snapped into the phone._

"_Julie?__"__ she heard a tearful voice say. _

"_Danielle?__"__ Julie asked, before moving out of the way of Bree, who lunged for the phone, __"__What__'__s wrong?__"__  
__"__Is Mom there?__"__  
__"__Yeah. I just talked to her.__"__  
__"__Look, Julie, her plan isn__'__t going to work.__"__  
__"__Why?__"__  
"I -- Aaugh! --I fell down the stairs! The baby's life is in danger. Julie, if it lives, I'll never let it -- ow! Ow! Aack --" _

"_You what?" _

_Danielle's phone merely fuzzed and faded out. Julie slowly hung up.

* * *

_

Julie bit her lip and opened the door. The hospital room was clean and long, lined with beds. Only one bed was occupied, by a pale girl with her brown hair in a ponytail, in a hospital gown and seemingly asleep.  
"Dan--" Julie rushed towards the bed, slipping and sliding on the white floor.  
"Danielle." Julie whispered, kneeling by the bed. Danielle's eyelids fluttered, and only then did Julie noticed her almost flat stomach. She should be nearly six months pregnant, and she was thin.

"Julie…" whispered Danielle, putting her hand on Julie's, "You…you came,"  
"Of course," Julie whispered, tearfully, "But, for the time being, you're my sister."  
Danielle smiled, "You were the closest I ever had. Did…did you tell Mom what happened?"  
"No," Julie sighed, "I never got a chance; I was on the verge of tears myself."  
Danielle took a shaky breath, "You're so sweet."  
Then tears started spilling from her eyes, "I lost her…"  
Julie realised her own face was wet, "Lost who?"  
"The baby…" Danielle whispered, "My own child. She was born…b-b-blue and so _tiny_. They did everything, but her lungs weren't strong enough."  
Julie let out a shaky sob as she gripped Danielle's hand, "I'm sorry. _So_ sorry. If I'd came when you'd first called, you'd be reassured and wouldn't have fought with Sister Anne!"

Danielle sat up and wrapped her arms around Julie, "There was _nothing _you could do. I hated Sister Anne. I'd have fought with her anyway."  
"But now your daughter is dead," Julie whispered, pulling away and looking Danielle in the face. Danielle had more tears pouring down her cheeks.

"_Don't say that_!"  
"I'm so sorry."  
Danielle drew her knees up to her face and put her head on her knees, sobbing quietly as Julie put her arms around her. They sat like that for God knows how long until Julie realised Danielle was breathing deeply, and was fast asleep. She half smiled and lay her back, pulling the duvet up to her chin. She sighed and felt her own cheeks, which were hard from dry tears.  
"Why am I crying?" she whispered, "Why is Danielle crying?"  
"You are crying for your friend," Sister Elizabeth's voice rung out, and Julie turned around to see her perching on the bed behind her, "Don't worry. I don't mind that you are not related. But, anyway, Danielle is your best friend. You must've known like I did that Danielle felt bad about all of this. She was obviously rethinking giving the baby up. You are crying for something your best friend has lost, and I am assuming because the sadness of the situation is really getting to you, as you are a sensitive person."  
Julie nodded, "I guess."  
"Danielle is crying because she really did love this baby, no matter how much she said she didn't. She is crying over a life that _could've _been. Now. I think that you didn't tell Mr. and Mrs. Hodge of the situation. I think you've got to do it yourself."  
"_Me_? Why can't _Danielle_?" Julie whined.

"You were the one who avoided telling them." the Sister grinned, "You've got to do it."  
Julie sighed and got up towards the hall, where she knew a phone stood.

* * *

Three hours away, in Fairview, Susan Mayer sat in Bree's living room with her and Lynette Scavo.

"Julie missed the wedding?" Bree cried.

Susan nodded, "I don't know where she is. She's _missing_."  
Lynette sighed, "Teenagers."  
The phone started ringing. Orson was out grocery shopping and Andrew was with him. She just let the machine get it.

"Hi, Mrs. Hodge," Julie's voice rang out. Susan and Bree leapt up.

"Why is she calling _you_?" Susan demanded.

Bree shrugged as the message went on, "…Mrs. Hodge, I'm with Danielle at the nunnery…"  
Bree gasped and grabbed the phone, "Julie? Julie, are you still there?"  
"Oh, hey," Julie sighed. Lynette and Susan just listened closely to the machine, where they could still hear the conversation.

"Why are you at the nunnery?" Bree asked.

"Danielle…when she called me earlier, something _was _up. I drove here before the wedding. You need to come. We need you," Julie said. Bree and the other women could hear the sadness in her voice, and she sounded like she'd been crying.

"Okay, Julie. But, can you give me a _gist_ of what's up?" Bree asked.

"Oh. It's Danielle's baby."  
Susan and Lynette gasped, loud enough for Julie to hear.

"Oh…Mom…" Julie's voice rang out, "I-I was just _kidding_. Erm…see ya,"  
Julie hung up. Bree had a pained expression on her face, and opened one eye to look at her friends, who were gaping. She put on a light-hearted smile.

"Who's going to help me get this fake pregnancy cushion off then?"

* * *

Julie sat on a chair in the hall of the nunnery. It was really late, about quarter to one in the morning, and she felt like she was going to drop off at any second, so she was biting the skin on her thumb, as the pain kept her awake. As her thumb started to bleed, Bree, Orson, Andrew and Susan came through the doors.

"Oh, Jesus Christ!" she muttered a little too loudly. All the nuns glared at her, while the four people who just appeared caught sight of her. They all charged at her, and Julie resisted the urge to run screaming for her life.

"Mrs. Hodge!" Julie cried, "You're thin! You must've dropped that pregnancy weight very quick!"  
Bree glared at her, and she and Susan started speaking at the same time.

"What is this about my daughter --?"  
"What the hell are you doing here, Julie? Three hours out of Fairview--!"  
"Okay, _shush_!" Julie snapped, hands on hips. The two women stopped, looking at Julie, who looked furious, had tear stains on her face and dark circles under her eyes.

"I am not in the mood to fight with you -- _either _of you! I came here because my friend needed me. And you two are not going to punish me for a _selfless _act! Now let _me explain_! Danielle is asleep, she has had a tough -- make that _absolutely horrible_ -- day."  
Julie's face softened as she felt tears well, and she turned to the Hodges, "I promised myself I wouldn't cry, but--"  
Julie took a deep breath, "Danielle got into a fight with Sister Anne. She stormed away and…and didn't notice the stairs. She fell down them,"  
Bree's face had turned into one of shock. She stared at Julie, mouth open, as she finished.

"…the baby…" tears finally came out of Julie's eyes, "S-s-she's gone. She was born blue and didn't have strong lungs and…the doctors did all they could…"

Julie started sobbing but fought off her mother's attempts to comfort her, "…and as well, do you know why she's so _upset_? Because she wasn't sure if she wanted to be a sister to this child. She was honestly thinking about being a _mother_. But now her daughter is dead…"  
Julie faltered, "Her daughter is dead. I-I just…wanted you to know that…"  
Julie turned on her heel and took off down the hall, even though she only had one idea where to go. Susan was torn. Bree also looked tearful, but her daughter had run away.

"Go," Orson whispered, putting his arm around Bree.

Susan nodded, and she followed Julie. Bree closed her eyes, letting one tear slip down her cheek as she whispered, "We…we need to go and see Danielle."  
She turned to Andrew and Orson, "She needs us now."  
Bree headed down the corridor, with Andrew and Orson in tow. She found the hospital wing easily, and when she opened the door, she saw two teenage girls standing at the far end of the wing, gazing out a large window. One brunette, one blonde. A brunette woman sat on a bed near them, but far enough away to give them some privacy. Bree walked forward, kicking off her high heels so she wouldn't make too much of a sound, and she went to sit next to Susan.  
"What's going on?" she whispered.

"They're talking it all out." Susan answered, "Even though you and I can offer them great advice; nurture and cherish them, nothing comes in the way of Danielle comforting Julie and Julie comforting Danielle."  
"That's true," Bree smiled, "It's good they can have a friend like that to depend upon all the time."  
Susan nodded, and turned to her red-headed friend, "You are going to be good to Danielle. You will probably be the best mom ever to her these next couple of weeks. Yet I know, at the end of the day, she'll still open everything up to Julie and no one else."  
Bree nodded sadly, "They're Danielle and Julie: Best Friends forever."

* * *

_Good gracious, I'm actually crying. I am really sad. I'm a brilliant, riveting writer…oh, the modesty! I'm not really good.. This is__ the last chapter. _What do you think of it? _Seriously, I'm interested. Glad I could end on a happy-ish note. I've always thought Julie and Danielle would be ultra-good friends, y'know? Hope you enjoyed. Please Review. _

_B.T.W. I stole at least 1 line from the movie 'Jaws' which is weird. _


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